why not try and make yourself

up up and away

2009-08-02T23:56:00.003+08:00

its quite scary to see how the index can soar up and up without stopping. at this juncture, i like to stay out and analyse the insanity that is going on. market psychology.

for the index to soar so high up, it must be that the listed companies are doing very well. probably having large cash flows and steadily increasing profits. or maybe securing future contracts that will attribute to future growth. however, i don't really think it is the case as of now. another reason would be over speculation, as i have mentioned before, taking the market for a wild ride.

at this moment, there are alot of buyers. investor confidence comes in and so does the buying. if there are so many buyers, who sells them? company can sell their shares that they may have bought back, making a profit on them and further driving the market up. short term traders holding positions for 3 days to a week may provide some liquidity for the buyers. all it needs is for the demand to get exhausted and the market will top.

but we can't really time that, so we just have to observe the market psychology for the time being. people are buying, so when will the buying stop. i know i'm being bearish on my viewpoint, but i feel that there might be some bumps along the way.

some updates

2009-07-27T23:50:00.002+08:00

STI has broken above the resistance of 2420 and soared higher. currently, it is trading at 2576, apparently with nothing to stop its paths. just to take note of the consecutive 3 day rise of the index. coupled with a weak show in the US market may trigger a short term correction or reversal.

if we look at the broader perspective, we have to analyse the reason for such a huge move in the singapore equities market. as compared to the US markets, the singapore index has been progressively charging up higher, almost back up to 50% from peak to bottom, whereas the US markets (namely the S&P 500) is around about 35% back up. one way to look at it is that the asian markets in general are doing better in terms of picking up the debris since the meltdown occurred 12 hours away. however, there is a pressing problem of over speculation.

i was looking though some key statistics and indicators of the economy and found that the current economic climate is still shaky and gray. most key indicators point to a drop in figures which doesn't really tally with what the index is reflecting. my fear is that over speculation of share prices may be what that is driving the index up. in my opinion, one contributing factor to the over speculation would be the notion that the recovery is on the way. because of this over optimism, prices and value tend to deviate, and prices would soar way above value.

then again, i might be wrong. but i have this feeling that it is not all rosy as of yet because at this rate, the index would be up to pre-crash levels by the end of this year. i may be a cynic, but i hope for another slide so that i can go shopping once more.

more on bollinger

2009-07-17T13:33:00.002+08:00

i've been using bollinger for a long time to trace out potential movement of stocks or indices. this is because bollinger takes into account volatility as well as moving averages.

for example: a couple of days ago, STI surged up many many points, over 70 plus points and closed there at its high. that broke the upper band of the bollinger band indicator. the next day, the index gapped up close to about 40 points, now you won't expect the index to surge up again don't you? thats pretty absurd. a good indication to short at that point would be when the index started to drop 5-10 points. good to short.

nonetheless, the prices are still above the band, so we may see a few more days of red. simple logic. the surge caused many short term investors to cash in on their positions. selling pressure builds. short sellers then take over to further facilitate the liquidity of the transactions, pushing prices lower.

i don't know how far it'll drop. but my guess is that if it goes low, first point to look at is 2300. not that low, i know.

nice

2009-07-02T22:17:00.003+08:00

i've been waiting for the S&P500 to drop. and finally it did! it was looming around the 926-928 levels for a couple of days. i knew it was impossible for it to go up any higher. i guess i was right. watch out for 892.

what's next?

2009-06-29T23:04:00.002+08:00

in the next few days, expect some sideways action in the market. looking at the STI, it is possible that it may move back up to 2330, to where the last support turned resistance was. alternatively, watch out for tomorrow's trading action. a bearish move would signal a further downwards move to levels of about back to 2220. currently STI on my chart hit its 20 EMA, and closed down.

if it goes red, go for it.

how accurate

2009-06-23T23:00:00.003+08:00

as perfect as it may seem, 2210 was really the support level i have pointed out. intraday levels was established. STI closed at 2226 today. we can expect 2210 to be tested again tomorrow, and it should head for the next support level once this level is broken.

enjoy :)

major exhaustion

2009-06-22T22:24:00.002+08:00

today was a perfect example of exhaustion. initial gap up in the STI triggered intra day selling, which followed by a flurry of buying. from then on, STI began tumbling to close about 17 points below its opening. what does this mean?

the resistance was perfectly establish, intraday, at around 2303, a little short of my initial estimates of 2310. nonetheless, we can expect to see a further down move on the STI in the coming days. this is starting to get purely exciting. of course, there is always a possibility of the market going back up. just keep that trigger on the short side and look for potential selling signals.

july will be a trying month for equities. we may see a further retracement from the peak of 2400 not only to 2200, but even lower. that will be established later.

now why is this so? like i've mentioned before, the rally cannot last. when the fundamentals of the companies are still weak and posting losses, it is not possible for STI to keep charging upwards. now we will see the equities market moving back to value.

what can we expect?

2009-06-21T23:01:00.003+08:00

based on the daily chart of STI with a 20 day bollinger band applied, the support was established prematurely at 2237. STI closed last friday around about 2270, which gives us a handsome profit of at least 130 points on the STI on the short side. those who were apt to notice the support levels like i've mentioned would have taken at most about 170 points on the short side from 2400. but where do we go from here?

firstly, the 27 day EMA is definitely going flat, possibly indicating a turnaround. we need to verify the downtrend when the 10 day EMA cuts it. STI may hover around this values for the days to come. however, if STI reacts correctly, we can see another day or two of green. possibly look out for exhaustion on the second day, a 2 day rise followed by gapping up and closing down. that should be at levels of around 2310 or so. from there we would need to establish the next targeted support level through the bollinger bands, possibly testing the 2237 support again. we would need the 20 day EMA to turn to establish out next target.

in the mean time, for longer term investors, it sure is a good time to sweep the floor for some bargains. of course, bit by bit :)

updates so far, and so far so good

2009-06-17T19:20:00.003+08:00

first resistance to watch out for STI would be around 2200. just to take note, 10EMA cutting down 20EMA.

bolinger band is a good tool to use to determine correction points in a trending market. however, i prefer using envelopes over bolinger bands as bolinger bands tends to stretch once the market gets volatile.

anyways, the market today closed above its opening. a sign to watch out. this may slow down the decline or even reverse it. it is anyone's guess. but in my opinion, the reason for strong buying pressure today would be due to eager buyers buying at a weak support at 2265, and short term traders covering their short positions. we may not see another super slide unless something critical hits the financial scene. however, if the market still wavers, then some slight medium term profit taking may set it, coupled with short sellers driving the market down to further its correction.

just a note, the equity market as seen great gains for the past few months, and the correction is highly likely. however, with the underlying economy still being bruised, share prices will most likely readjust itself back to its underlying value.

round top

2009-06-15T23:01:00.002+08:00

a few signs that i look for from the STI graph.

1) round top signalling slowing of upwards momentum.

2) failure to break 2420 resistance level.

3) breaking of the 2330 support level, and subsequently, breaking on the 10 day EMA.

some patterns i observed on the STI. there is always a retracement just above the 61.8% mark on the fibonacci retracement levels. this applies to the upwards move on 9 march, 1 april, 30 april, and 18 may. currently, the STI is hovering at a critical level where it always retraces to. what do we have to look out for?

firstly, tomorrow's trading bias. a further down move below opening and a move to the 61.8% retracement line would signal a short. this would also mean that it would be a short if the 20 day EMA is broken.

levels to look out for: the lowest that i set would be around 2100 (the support level on 18 may), 2190 to 2200 is a possible support level. keep a watch on how STI behaves.

macroeconomic analysis

2009-06-13T12:21:00.002+08:00

i don't usually do fundamental analysis but i guess its good to analyse the underlying factors at what drives the markets once in a while. i'll be giving my opinions on the happenings around the world, and the possible outcome in the near future. for those who are unsure about investment opportunities, maybe it would be worth a read.

1) monetary policy in the US
central bank is increasing money supply, eventually, prices are going to increase due to inflation. however, the effects of inflation are not yet seen, or are not that drastic as of yet. inflation may be imminent, if the monetary policy keeps up.

2) shift of government investments
other governments around the world are aware of this situation and are pulling part of their investments out of the US treasury bonds. this is because the US dollar value has slid more than 11% compared to other currencies. bonds are essentially affected by currency values. as a result, they will have to invest in other instruments to ensure that part of their US investments in the US treasury bonds are hedged against the currency slide. instruments we are looking at are mainly commodities.

3) why commodities
commodities are priced in US dollar, and if inflation does set in, the value of the US dollar is going to slide further. as a result, the prices of commodities has to go up, hence a good hedging tool. besides, countries like china (a rising power) will want to acquire resources that they control so that they can be self reliant. with their recent purchase attempts, it shows that china has been strategically investing in its future growth.

4) where is the potential
the potential is definitely in commodities, as well as crude oil. the demand for oil will begin to increase once the economic crisis is over, and speculators are already pushing prices up bit by bit. i guess they are pretty much looking to push it up to $80 per barrell, and possibly $100. also, the potential also lies in asian economies, mainly hong kong, china, india, probably singapore.the money flow is now coming to the east asian region, so it is a good location for an investment.

there are still other factors that points to why we should look into these areas. definitely, when the recovery comes in around 4 years or so, the market leaders will definitely come from asia, and most likely, china.

for more investment opportunities, feel free to contact me :: es_mc2@hotmail.com

success

2009-06-11T00:40:00.002+08:00

STI yesterday triggered a long signal with an upwards hammer on the 10 EMA. the positive close today finished a 3 day bullish candlestick pattern. other indicators such as RSI and stochastic confirms the upwards move. target still remains at 2480. other than that, just watch if the market starts to go crazy. nothing is 100% sure, except if it had already happened.

bearish engulfing

2009-06-08T20:15:00.002+08:00

huge pullback on STI today as the market plunged over 60 points. currently, STI is at its 10 EMA and indicators are pointing down. lets do some analysis. current trend: uptrend because 10 EMA is still above 27 EMA (my own indication). from the past few weeks, STI has bounced up from 10 EMA up to the upper limit of the 20 EMA envelope, hence there is a possibility of the uptrend continuing and the STI to reach further up. alternatively, bearish engulfing could indicate a further downwards move, so be weary.

if a downside is to be seen, 2285 will be the mark. as for upside, hard to say, probably 2480. all depends on tomorrow's opening and how the market progresses within 10-20 minutes. that should give some direction.

indication?

2009-06-06T19:23:00.003+08:00

just an indication when the S&P closes in the opposite direction of the DOW. yesterday S&P closed in the red while the DOW closed in the green. however, both closed below their respective opens. but with the S&P being a broader indicator of US stocks, we can roughly pick out some signs that may tell us something. further down move may be seen, contrary to my bullish stint on the STI.

just have to watch out as STI may be shaky on the upside on monday, and from tuesday onwards it should be clearer.

updates on STI

2009-06-05T21:56:00.004+08:00

been awhile since i've posted any updates. as before, STI did break out from the wedge and is staying up. it has been on an upwards charge, bouncing off 10 EMA and back up again. from what i can see, next week should see a further upwards move if STI is able to maintain its momentum. another 100 points perhaps? my guess is 2480. it could be anybody's guess. let's just watch.

nothing else i can say except for go with the flow. if the market says up, we go up. we will have to wait for a possible retracement. possible. just watch for it.

i see red

2009-05-26T21:44:00.003+08:00

based on charting, anyone can point out that STI is creating an ascending flag or upwards wedging, maybe poised for a breakout. important level to watch is 2285. however, today proved to be a down day as it tried to reach the high of 2285. i believe that there will be a few more down days after today since the charge has lost its momentum.

areit is showing a short but the perfect entry would be on monday. just need to watch out for a slight pullback after 4 days in the red. short on strength, 10/27 EMA showing that areit is starting to downtrend. target at 1.23. if its still downtrending, enter a short back at 10-day EMA. stochastic crossover will confirm movement.

reversal at peak

2009-05-21T21:42:00.002+08:00

time to share some trading views. it's been awhile since i've put up anything, so lemme just get the ball rolling again.

with STI closing in the red today, the daily chart for the past 2 weeks nicely shows a double top formation. other indicators may confirm the reversal with stochastic cutting its signal and RSI showing a bearish divergence. why i would say that this might be a potential reversal? simple. the market failed to break its previous high of 2285, created a peak and sank. RSI shows a weakening momentum, indicating weakness in the upwards movement. we could see STI moving to 1990, which is a 50% retracement from the start of the up move. important level to watch is the 2132 support, in which a move below this could signal the retracement or reversal.

i was long on AREIT a few days back, showing a nice upwards hammer with a stochastic cut. RSI also shows a positive divergence and the stock was on a steady uptrend. however, it started acting weird with 2 days hovering around its open, indicating that it has lost abit of steam. so i guess it was right to pull out. the stock closed at 1.36 today, not a very good sign. i'm not turning short on this stock just yet although 10EMA has already cut 20EMA. worth waiting a little bit more.

i always loved looking at capitaland when trading volume is high. today it made a reverse hammer, hanging... short signal? maybe, but i would prefer it to gap up in the sky, at least showing me a shooting star. other indicators such as stochastic and RSI showing that a downwards move is imminent. a slight bearish divergence on the RSI that i would not discount, but its worth looking. capitaland would be a good short, just look out for 3.33 and 3.13 support levels.

i was so stupid

2009-05-21T21:34:00.002+08:00

i decided to clean out my cupboard. i just got 7 to 9 new t-shirts and a couple of shorts so i decided to tear up my wardrobe. i dragged out a pile of clothes neatly folded and well, i came across an old paperbag. my heart sank. it was the one she was looking for. there was a diary inside, and i thought to myself, better not read it. like she said, it might "reopen old wounds that have been painfully stitched". i have a knack of not listening to anyone so i went ahead and read, looking for specific dates in the diary.

i was scarred, and angry.

i guess i had no name back then. i was kept a secret, a dark secret affair that could never be made public. i was like a toy that you kept in your closet, a source of comfort in your loneliest days but it would also make you feel guilty because i was supposed to be kept a secret. honestly i hated this and for many years i've endured.

there was no mention of me.

none at all.

what am i to you? what was i to you? seriously, what was i to you?

i hope you are reading this. i'm just sharing with you the pain. the blood never stopped flowing. there are still shards lodged within this aching heart.

another great day

2009-04-26T17:58:00.002+08:00

yes it was another great day. it was cloudy and cold, just the way i like it. it helps me think clearly. it helps me remember. but it never helps me forget.

funny how i define a great day to be one where it is all dark and gloomy, where i simply have time to myself and do nothing. since when have i been this way? funny, i don't remember. now the only thing missing is the last string on my guitar. i really should get a new set of strings. i wish there was an online shopping site where they would deliver the guitar strings right to my doorstep. maybe there is...

well anyways i'm torn between ghs bright bronze contact core, ghs vintage bronze and ghs silk and bronze. i'm not a fan of sounds that are too warm and mellow, i'm gunning for sounds that are brighter, slightly warm is fine, as well as crispy, giving that tone suitable for studio recording. if you do have any inputs i'd like to hear them out. currently i'm using bright bronze contact core strings, and they do provide great sustain and a full and rich tone. i might want to try something different.

sadly, its not longer raining now. i wish it would continue throughout the night. no i'm not being emo, i thrive in the dark and i have a dark dark life. and exams are next week and the week after, i'm expecting myself not being able to breathe for awhile, but once that is over it is going to be a long long break that we all truly deserve.

are we really going short?

2009-04-16T19:51:00.002+08:00

the markets have been on a rampage since a number of weeks back. it has been up, up and up. but is there any reason behind this? i have no clue. but lets just look at some of the factors and you make your own call, and tell me have you ever seen a bear charging up.

economic conditions in general hasn't been all good. positive news have been sporadic, adding fuel to the rally. the current climate still looks very dark and gloomy, and there isn't really a light at the end of the tunnel. not anytime soon. but why this strong upwards move?

my best guess to this question would simply be human rational/irrational behaviour. once the low was touched again, it formed a double bottom pattern, and bargain hunter scooped huge baskets of stocks and keep them in their portfolio. herd mentality led others to do the same as his neighbour or the shoe shine boy. the huge wave in buying led to an increase in momentum in buying pressure, a wave that swept short sellers by surprise, forcing them to cover their positions at either a loss or a reduced profit, spurring the rally. like pouring fuel to a fire.

as a result, the market gives a false sense of impression that businesses are picking up, the market has waded the storm floods and the sun is back up again. people are in a positive mood.

then as we look at the next critical resistance, the highest high since the lowest low was touched, this is where short sellers are lying wait. the wait for the next sign that the momentum has died, and the frenzy of buying will lead to the next wave of manic selling.

today the market turned, whether that is an indication or not, i can't say for sure. it might just be a consolidation. but all i can say is that if you expect the stock market to pick up, stop and rethink.

the next wave will come, and its going to be down.

wtf

2009-04-09T21:49:00.002+08:00

i can't believe that i still reminisce. its kind of shitty when you think of it. you are enjoying your life now. well good for you, but never discredit what ive done for you and how i did make a difference. i know who you credit for what you've become, but seriously until then, no one knew you better in this world than me.

never discredit me, for i never did discredit you.

2009-03-22T21:44:00.002+08:00

i was watching band of brothers this afternoon and i was strangely immersed into the setting of the show. i must say that it is one of the best ww2 shows out there.

how i wish i lived in that era. much better than training during ns i must say. isn't it wonderful to live each day, not knowing whether you would be able to see the light of tomorrow? i want to walk and fight on the frontlines, each day seeing new places far away from home. each time staying and harbouring in a place so foreign to me. each day moving forwards, no turning back.

to be honest, if i had to do that to protect my loved ones, i'd get up and fight.

in one of the scene, an enlisted man took out a photo, and it reminded me of us. how only that photo got me through the thick and thin. how i felt like crying each time i looked at it. but the only difference is that i'm proud to tell others about us, while you were too preoccupied with something else on your mind.

just to prepare for whats up tomorrow, sti has a high likelihood of moving up, provided it can shake off the dow's slide down. expect dow to continue on its path.

sti and the dow

2009-03-20T19:24:00.004+08:00

dow jones is at its resistance, with 2 days of high volume trading, slight spinning top double and indicators on negative ROC. expect the dow to move downwards tonight, and continue for the next week. 7100 is the initial level to look out for, followed by 6516 if the downtrend persists.

sti showed a spinning top pattern, at a crucial support/resistance level. no abnormalities in volume indicating consolidation, and i expect sti to carry on its move upwards if monday shows strong buying pressure. level to look out for is 1635, this is where sti is going if its going up.

just to point out that intraday volatility for indexes may give false trading signals. thus, it is prudent to widen your stop losses.

updates

2009-03-17T22:59:00.002+08:00

once again i was reminded of my past. how bittersweet it was. it was akin to lightning flashes as the memories flashed on and off, triggering a flurry of senses throughout my whole body. this is distracting. utterly.

i was looking at the dow and sti. dow had made a 50% retracement from its trough and is currently weakening in motion. i would expect channel trading to occur between yesterday's high and the lowest low. as for the sti, it is hovering around a key support/resistance level, an upwards break of 1630 would signal further upmove. as with the down, expect channel trading to occur.

thats all.

sorry.

a need for change

2009-03-13T12:35:00.002+08:00

he said that life was like a box of chocolates, and that you'll never know what you get inside. indeed, you will never know what you will get inside. but before getting that box of chocolates, don't tell me you bought hershey's bittersweet chocolate expecting something else like white chocolate inside.

i always believed that all of us are in control of our lives. we control our destiny and we make our own choices. we may be swayed by those around us, but ultimately, it is the choices we make that sets us on the path of our own lives.

it is indeed another rainy day, and i'm loving it.

my life hasn't always been perfect in a normal sense. how good can life be when you endure failures and suffering? people always choose to see the darker side of life, and only choose to embrace the darkness. but what i'm trying to bring across here is that darkness should be embraced, and you should hold steady in your hands, a lit candle that will help you see through the darkness.

when i was young, i mixed with the wrong company and went on a rebellion rampage. as i grew older, i got worse and began to stray from my ideals. it took me some time to get my act together. it took a threat from my dad to wake me up from my carefree slumber. it took several scarring from my mum to get properly educated. that is my life.

today, as i look around, i see my past in alot of people. carefree and reckless. youths spending their parents money on rubbish just to satisfy their basic needs and the need for acceptance into their "community" which would one day screw them over. i see helpless people, who lack that personal drive in doing something and let their emotions get the better of them. i see failure turned into more failure because giving up seems like the best option.

indeed there is a need for change. i want to be the change.

what will happen next?

2009-03-06T22:59:00.005+08:00

as i have mentioned in my earlier post, the market seems to have some more room for a downwards move. this is the path of least resistance. right now upon analysing STI, it is clear that it is being driven down heavily on fundamentals, primarily the weakened banking stocks. and so what is next for the market?

investors would be please with the current market climate. right now, investors should be keeping high levels of cash and liquid assets, or safe yields. my suggestion would be a 1-2 year government bond just to get a higher return on your cash. banks do not offer much except for their timed deposits. 1-2 years? yup. isn't that a little too long? yup, i'll explain why later on.

now, speculators like me will expect further shorting opportunities after a slight technical rebound. STI is currently nearing its 52-week low and is exhibiting slight buying pressure. monday might see the continuation of the rebound up to 1570, depending on on how the market opens and reacts within the first hour of trading. high chance of it testing 1470 if the market gaps up and shows strong selling pressure.

now, what will happen once peace and order has been restored? the market will go into a consolidation phase, just like the scene of a war movie where the dust settles. during this period, individuals are starting to gain confidence in the market. this would be led by bold investors who are ready with cash on hand to grab up bargains. the market will move sideways, probably in a channel.

you may ask, how come the prices still go down in an uptrending market? well, profit taking will set in and traders will lock in their profits once a targeted price has been reached. and to those of you who says technical analysis is bullshit, well think again. the market is made up of individuals who react based on history. like previous highs and lows.

once confidence in the market is fully restored, we can see another slow bull run to the next top, and an even further top when greed drives prices way beyond what they are supposed to be. like if i sell you an apple for $5 per apple.

where is the bottom?

2009-03-06T13:08:00.002+08:00

lets hit some boring topics for the day.

i've been observing the market patterns these few days and the only conclusion i can get from it is that investors are in a state of confusion. from the looks of it, STI is heading downwards, and this is primarily due to the banking stocks such as DBS, OCBC and UOB. i could still remember a few months ago when someone told me, "hey, DBS is quite cheap now, only at 8 dollars plus, i think it may be good if i buy in some."

and my typical response was, "the end is not over, this isn't the real bottom."

people would ask me how i would know such an absurd fact. honestly, i am only speculating. that is my job. but if i were to give a rational presentation of my speculation, i would not make sense for a market recovery when most of the world's financial situation hasn't been solved yet.

i'm not an investor honestly. but i do look at the overall picture. i look at how the market operates. just like a doctor, i study the inner workings of the markets.

now, selling has set it. however, we have to cautiously tread this volatile market. the final wave, in my opinion, is now. but instead of a violent wave of selling, we are seeing a different last wave. this would be a slow but painful death. a high likelihood that this retracement will take the market back to the pre-bullish period of 2002/2003.

we'll wait awhile till DBS touches 6.25 to 6.50. currently, it is at 6.91.

be grateful

2009-02-27T23:52:00.002+08:00

we should be grateful for the things that are given to us, as well as the good things that were done to us. there are people i know who choose not to be grateful, especially when it causes them to subconsciously link their thoughts to a bad memory. after all, we are only human.

i am truly grateful for all that has happened, be it good or bad. that is how i am able to move forwards in life without regret. if i hadn't been beaten by a leather belt, a feather duster and a clothes hanger, i would probably not be in a good school studying right now. probably mixing with the wrong company and doing the wrong things.

i am grateful. my life is in check. i control it.

dark days are good days

2009-02-23T12:39:00.004+08:00

dark days are best for reflection. like today, the sky was overcast, and it gave me another opportunity for my personal reflection.

as the birds chirped all around me, i could sense an overwhelming feeling of freedom run through me. life is about choices, and sadly, in this world, freedom has not been given its chance. everywhere, i see people slogging their asses off, working for money. money is the blood that drives our lives, and not blood itself. life, is all about money.

in school, i see characters. people who make obvious efforts to make an impression, to leave a mark. efforts that are too obvious that sometimes, it makes you think about what they do. it is true that success comes not without hard work, but hard work doesn't always attribute to success.

many a times i have told people around me how much i dreaded going to school. i am learning the same thing as all others do. what makes me unique, what makes me stand out? i believe that studying the same thing doesn't allow me to do so. then i looked at those who are very much passive, focusing on their studies all the time while secluding themselves from the outside world. all i can say is that failure would befall them.

failure is a subjective term, and is often compared to success. personally, success is greatness, and the ability to live the life i've always wanted. happiness, freedom and a life that falls in place, at any place in time. that is my success. i want wealth, both with money and life. i want to swim in an ocean of money, and in the sea of life. i want to be full of them.

and i often think of the future. how it would be like, and how i would live it. my future is always dark, in a literal sense because i imagine my life in the future, living in a penthouse with a lovely wife, admiring the tears of heaven beat down on the people beneath.

to those of you reading this, let me post you something to ponder about. how do you want your life to be? living on margins, sufficiently paying off debts of your loans, be it cars, credit facilities and housing, with your paycheck? you would rather work to make someone else rich, and make it barely through life, rather than work to make yourself rich? would you still choose to remain ignorant at this stage in life and take it as it comes? would you let life control you, or would you rather control your life? would you rather sleep now and enjoy your dream, only to wake up in cold sweat knowing that your life isn't the way you wanted it to be?

wake up friends. you are on the wrong side of the bed.

a tiny reflection

2009-02-08T13:02:00.002+08:00

a man, once tired of his life, decided to take a journey through the desert. he thought that if he were to survive the journey with whatever limited supply he has, then he would be fortunate indeed to even make it out alive. after all, he was thinking of ending his life on that journey.

as he embarked on the journey, he began thinking of the events that have happened in his past, and he began cursing and swearing every time he thought of something really bitter. and he thought to himself, "why can't you make the pain end right here and now?!"

3 days into the journey, he had completely exhausted his rations and was starting to feel light headed. his bottle was almost dry and the scorching sun beat down on him mercilessly. it was as though he was being whipped by a thousand demons that were out to torture, but not to kill him.

as he trudged on inch by inch, he saw an oasis about a hundred metres away. he smiled, and said, "bah... this would only drag on my misery!"

in spite of all the negativity, he decided to carry on his journey to the oasis.

upon reaching the oasis, he began gulping down huge scoops of water like a mad elephant. he splashed some water on his face as he felt all the pain melt away with each trickle of water down his face. just then, did he realise that...

he forgot to smoke the pack of Next Chill Menthol he had brought along with him throughout his journey!

as he lit his first cigarette and took in the first puff, he began thinking more about his life. and all he said after that was: Life is Good.

and i'm gonna have my first stick for the day now. enjoy!

Technical Analysis on Capitaland

2008-11-10T23:38:00.002+08:00

Capitaland:
Currently closed at 3.24, Stochastics and RSI showing strength and moving towards overbought levels. Now hovering just above resistance at around 3.15, not really a significant breakout due to the lack of movement in today's session. Based on candlestick analysis, a "hanging man" or "upright hammer" is formed today. MACD shows a weakened Bear at the start of this mini rally, confirming that the bear rally has arrived. However, no further divergences can be seen as of today. Power of the Bulls is still the same as the previous high on 20 October.

Possible outcomes:
1) Reversal imminent due to the presence of the "hanging man" and 3.15 has been proving to be a strong resistance.
2) Further move above resistance which may indicate strong upwards breakout will trigger a long signal, placed with a tight stop loss. Price target of 3.65, stop at 3.20.

invest? whats that?

2008-10-08T19:35:00.003+08:00

most of us are unaware. but if we do not make our money work harder, they would eventually decay and succumb to the effects of inflation. when we talk about working harder, investments would be the natural course of action. however, many are unsure of how to go about investing their money, let alone classify and identify the risks of investing. those who are aware may be wondering: when is the right time to invest?

let me help you guys out. there are many ways to invest, and many sectors to invest in. think of it as a vehicle that brings you from point A to point B. the vehicle you choose determines how you are going to get to your eventual destinations.

high risk investments can be seen as a car strapped with rockets. or maybe a motorcycle. fast and can eventually lead you beyond your destination. the speed at which you reach your destination is in relation to the investment returns you are getting. of course, a car strapped with rockets isn't the safest form of vehicle you would want to ride on. furthermore, it may crash, and hence need some repairs (costs or losses) before being able to proceed an reach an eventual destination.

low risk investments are the opposite, and well, should be self explanatory.

of course you wont say "i want to invest in a rocket car", but you might say "i want to invest in an aggressive fund that carries a high weightage of equities and derivatives". the choice is yours.

now many people ask me about the right time to invest. honestly speaking, there's is no 'right time' to invest. investments ought to be viewed as a long term commitment that when you eventually foresee that you may need to cash in your investments, you have a significant amount of gains.

some may ask whether now is a good time to invest. i say why not. warren buffet may say why not. if you go to the jewellery shop one day and you find that the diamond rings go for one dollar a piece, would you tell yourself that you'd buy it another day because the valuation of diamond rings are so bad now you want to wait for the price to go up to maybe $100 then you buy them? well to put it simply, buy when something is cheap and wait for its value to appreciate, rather then miss out on the opportunity that lies ahead.

for more info, i'll be more than happy to share.

this week's TA

2008-09-22T10:32:00.002+08:00

i know its abit late but i didn't really have over the weekends to do my analysis. i just had too much fun :)

anyways something different this week, i'll be focusing on 2 indices which i trade on, STI and HSI.

today STI opened 50 points higher, but slowly declined as the trades goes on. last week's trading session saw great movements and volatility within the day, gapping up and down and ranging over 50 points on certain days. one thing to note, because of the recent turmoil in the financial markets, the indices tend to follow suit. thursday and friday saw a slight correction after the 3 day slump, thanks to the US Federal Reserves. good thing for me, this would hopefully give the index some momentum to carry on moving downwards.

looking at RSI, it shows a divergence, having a slight downwards slope at the end of the trading week (even though there was a huge correction), stochastics are moving out of the oversold regions after crossing signal and MACD can't really show me anything clear cut yet.

my opinion on the movement this week: if the index today doesn't manage to sustain a positive movement, the trading week may be bearish. looking at the divergence from RSI, the index doesn't seem to have the momentum for a bullish move, hence, expect the bear to come this week.

now for our favourite index: HSI. same thing as STI, the index opened higher than friday's close, but moved downwards as the trading session moved on. last week, the index had huge movements, its 5 day EMA moving further downwards from its 10 day EMA, but the correction on thursday and friday gave the index some momentum to carry its move downwards this week.

stochastics are moving out of the oversold regions, while RSI is slightly positive in terms of gradient. and again, MACD can't really tell me anything much right now as i can't relate them to the previous 2 indicators.

since today seems bearish for the index, and if it manages to stay in the red, the week's outlook may be bearish, continuing its momentum from last week's session.

well, that's all folks. i'm still abit sleepy, if anything don't make sense, please comment. thank you!

back bear back

2008-09-07T13:24:00.003+08:00

finally back after a long reprieve. gosh school is such a boring place because of the assignments and tests. if there were no assignments nor tests, i'd definitely enjoy going to school.

lets look at some short term technical outlook for this week. the past week had seen the market being trampled on by the bear due to various economic and environmental reasons. what's in store for this week? we'll just have to wait and see. but before we wait, we shall analyse the market's current direction and project next week's movement. ready? lets go.

for the case of SGX, i doubt next week's picture would be a pretty one unless something happens along the way which may change its course of direction. current stochastics shows a negative picture, indicating further downward movements while RSI remains below the 40% mark. MACD is already almost cutting the signal line (or has it already had a piece of the cake?) and is showing that yes down is the way to go. a technical picture from the charts shows that a support of 5.50 is likely after friday's close of 5.95. this would all depend on tomorrow. a negative session might carry the momentum further downwards through the week.

next up, Capitaland. current indicators show that it would be a good to short. with stochastics cutting the signal line negatively and RSI levels looms just above the 20% mark, the prices are weak. MACD is painting a sell portrait while it starts to cut the signal line again. a 3.80 may be calling? we'll just have to wait and see. technical charts shows that it may enter a short term consolidation before carrying on its momentum. moving down is the most likely option for the prices after the near term consolidation but the already weak prices may get hit even harder.

HSI has been pretty powerful these few days with its huge movements into the red. RSI is showing a slight diversion, making the near term outlook harder to foresee. however, sticking to current indicators, the downtrend is already present. stochastics and MACD are showing a likelihood of carrying the index downwards for the week. the index may consolidate tomorrow, but a sustained open below 20,000 would indicate the rather obvious.

STI took a hard hit as most of the companies took a blow. moving down 3%-4% over the past week is a huge feat, making me wonder where it would fit in on monday. in terms of a technical picture, indicators show signs of a continued downtrend even if it opens above friday's close. support at 2,600? indeed it was supposed to be but friday's session brought it a tad prematurely. if the movement sustains below this support level, then we could see a continuation of the trend for the week or so.

well thats all for me, my eyes are dead with the lack of sleep. enjoy the market week ahead and have an eventful trading session!

worry now or worry later?

2008-08-13T00:31:00.002+08:00

where will you be 10 years from now? highly successful businessman? top remisier? world class hedge fund manager? a housewife? engineer, technician or architect? whatever your job may be, you would definitely be doing something to pass your time. however, from now till then, what will you be doing as you carry out your daily activities?

let me present you with some food for thought. how is your marriage going to be like? would you like to live in your dream house or just a simple 3 room flat? would you like to have a child, or a soccer team?

the needs are non-exhaustive. we all want things that we don't have, and yet, when the time comes for us to obtain our needs, we are set back by our budget constraint. the world, is made of money. all green and crumpled. money makes the world go round, and so does our head.

imagine ten years from now, you start to think back to the day when you should've start managing your finances well, instead of splurging on your LV bag or that zara tanktop. and what you have now, is practically nothing. you can't afford your dream house, you can't start a family and you are unable to sustain your desired standard of living.

the above scenario isn't made up. in fact, many singaporeans are facing the problem of having insufficient funds to sustain their standard of living. but wait! how come people still drive luxury cars, go shopping every weekends and dine in expensive restaurants? all this is possible to mr mastercard and mr amex. these 2 baddies put our poor souls in debt, by making it look as if we are in control. think again, it is not you who control the line of credit, but the line of credit controls you.

how do they make it affordable? simple. it is all in the "minimum sum". pay $100 a month for 3 years and you'd probably end up paying $1,000 more than what you purchased for. and well, that $1,000 in the future is definitely worth more today because of inflation.

too much to handle? well it is. the only way to get out of the rat race is to beat the credit demon, and manage your finances well. save for the rainy day even though the rainy day may not come. leverage your funds through investment vehicles to make your money work harder for you. protect your future income against uncertainty or risks. and once you are out of the rat race, you would naturally have a peace of mind for the rest of your life.

worry now or worry later? i say, worry only for today, and do something about it tomorrow so you won't have to worry anymore.

technical analysis

2008-07-07T00:09:00.002+08:00

time again for another round of analysis. this would serve as a continuation of last week's analysis. let's first look at SGX's performance.

the stock closed in on friday at 6.68, just as i thought it would. the week saw a downtrending trading session, from 6.92 down to 6.68. currently the market may show a sign of a temporary recovery as H1 earnings are going to be reported (even though the earnings may be below expectations, an slightly higher than what was negatively expected could trigger a hiccup).

as we can see from this stock, share prices have been on a steady decline without any stoppages for consolidation or a correction, hence, most people would expect a slight correction coming up soon. however, in my opinion, since the market is still relatively quite, the steady downtrend is just an indication of how weak and 'lifeless' the market is and as far as anticipating a correction, i'm not too sure.

currently stochastics are still hovering in the oversold regions, where the last 2 trading days pushed the stochastics above the signal line with a green trading session. now with this, i would refer to RSI readings, but at the moment, the momentum of the stock is still weak, and i would need a convincing move above the 30% or 50% mark spark a long signal. as far as the MACD goes, i can't really get a clear indication from the readings as of late. however, if upcoming trading sessions shows a positive divergence, then i better keep my eyes peeled for an upturn.

my verdict: next week looks rather uncertain. i'm not sure whether there would be an upwards correction of the prices, but from the looks of it, prices may continue to fall. here are 2 scenarios. first, if share prices presents a lower open, and ends the day in the red, then just be prepared for a steady downtrend. second, if prices open higher and ends the day in the green, then keep eyes peeled for a correction. however, in my opinion, if prices continue to fall, it may fall down to the 6.50 level, where it should nestle and find strong support.

Capitaland shocked me with a rebound over the last 3 days of the week, closing on friday at 5.79 from a low of 5.57 on tuesday. i guess my verdict on the stock fell short on wednesday when the share prices shot upwards. i believe that it was a much needed correction before prices can continue downwards.

as it stands, stochastics shot way above the signal line and has cut above the 50% mark, a potentially good long signal. however, i would wait for my RSI reading to cross above the 50% mark before going long (currently just hovering below the halfway mark). the positive divergence on the low closing of 27th june and 1st july may have sparked the 3 day uptrend during the week. however, looking at the current readings, a sustained move above the signal line may indicate further uptrending for days to come.

personally i am still rather bearish about this stock at the moment, but something tells me to shed the bear skin and put the bull horns on. so far i have arrived at a number of conclusions regarding this stock.

my verdict: currently, it is the end of the downtrend (for the moment) and i would advise others to wait till the dust cloud settles and a clear trend presents itself before jumping on the bandwagon. a higher open tomorrow with a close in the green may signal an upward move. if the prices were to move upwards, i'd probably give an estimate of about 0.30 to 0.40 depending on market sentiments. it may move up to its resistance at about 6.20 and may drop back down to 5.70 mark. and when this happen, try and watch out for a reverse HNS. if tomorrow's session presents a lower open and ends off in the red, then be cautious over the next couple of days to establish a clear direction. i believe that the 5.50 level is still open for testing if the momentum carries the stock downwards. as of now, i won't be surprised if the prices were to move up for the next couple of days.

that's all folks, has been a busy week so far. enjoy and have a good trading week.

technical analysis for this week

2008-06-29T21:19:00.002+08:00

wow the week has passed in such a short amount of time. and it is finally time for the euro 2008 finals. sadly, i'm not your punter so i won't be talking about odds, but let's assess my two favourite stocks and see how they would perform this coming week.

currently as it is, share prices for SGX closed in at 6.92, 0.08 below my defined support at 7.00. the week's session saw a general decline as volume of trading remains relatively low. as a result, the stock hasn't been very volatile in the current down market, but the positive thing about that is that the direction is certain, and so far it has been a clear downtrend for weeks.

as it stands, conditions for SGX are similar this week as it is to last week, however, the support at 7.00 may require a little bit of testing. RSI showing a negative momentum, and coupled with stochastics crawling in the oversold regions, seem to indicate a further downtrend in the next week or two. however, a couple of scenarios may likely emerge. firstly, monday's session may see an upside gap back above support levels (if 7.00 seem to prove to be quite a support) and that the trading session for the day would end in the red. secondly, the downtrend would most likely continue and keep heading down, down and down.

my verdict: if prices open up above 6.92 on monday, watch for price actions and get a sense of where the market stands with the stock. if there's a huge selling pressure, then by all means go long on your puts or short the stock. for those not really apt with market sentiments, a close below 6.92, or even below 7.00 may give the same signal. and well if there's a huge selling pressure and the market opened lower than 6.92, what are you waiting for?

as for Capitaland, the situation remains similar to that of last week's trade. for those with an eye for charts, currently, the share prices are at the consolidation phase, and there's a slight positive divergence that can be seen from the past 2 weeks. i emphasise, very slight. i can't really tell whether it'll prove to be any form of reversal signal, but my best guess is a definite NO.

as what was quoted last week, the stock didn't have enough downward momentum to carry it lower to the 5.50 levels. however, now it becomes even clearer to me because of the consolidation phase it is currently in. if so, the next week may see a continuation, mainly because stochastics are pointing down and RSI isn't really pointing very much upwards. it is somewhat likely that prices may fluctuate upwards, up to the 5.70 levels, however, a breakout would be needed and that would come from a lower open on monday. and in my honest opinion, the only way for the prices is down.

my verdict: a lower open would signal a breakout, and a close in the red, a confirmation. need i say more? go long on puts, or short the stock.

that's all folks, and well all i can tell you is that it is possible to make money from both of these stocks now. hope you guys make lots this week to come.

happy trading!

money money money

2008-06-28T12:31:00.002+08:00

money makes the world go round. and round, and round and round. money goes around the world too, at exceptionally high speeds that we, as consumers, simply love to ignore.

in a recent article on business times, it was quoted that there was about 77,000 high net worth (HNW) citizens in singapore. high net worth would mean that he or she has at least S$1,000,000 (that's one million for those who are bad with numbers) in liquid assets. liquid assets would generally mean basic cash in savings account, or even holding in equities, bonds and other financial instruments. wow. amazing isn't it.

then we look even further back in time and we can see how inflation rates within the country skyrocketed, reaching as high as 7.5%. and currently, the rates doesn't seem to be heading lower.

as compared to our regional neighbours, we have to thank the strength of our singapore dollar against others. despite such trying times, our currency value remains strong and there wasn't a very significant tumble.

with such major problems bogging us from all around us, how can we afford to spend so much and have so little? then it that case should we save too much and spend too little? how do we preserve the value of our money?

so let us talk about savings. now any tom, dick and harry should be familiar with how the bank works. put money with them and the money will grow. wow, grow, but by how much? now any tom, dick and harry won't realise that interest rates being paid out by banks are pathetic in combating the inflation. at an interest rate of 0.25%, you are below inflation by 7.25%! wait hang on, what is inflation?

lets look at it this way, just to put it simply. say you have one dollar today, and inflation rates are at 10%. say you tell yourself that you are going to put this dollar and bury it in your flower pot for a year, hoping a money tree will come out. then a year later, you take our the coin, but instead of a money tree, you have deposits of rust on the coin. bravo.

then, you take your dollar coin to the provision shop downstairs and you think that you might want to have a bottled soft drink since you have been hibernating for a whole year, together with your dollar. so you asked the store owner "hello uncle, this bottle of 100Plus costs one dollar right?" however, to your horror, the owner gives you an icy glare and says "ONE DOLLAR TEN CENTS!" and with that you go "WHAT THE FUDGE?!"

the above scenario, though may be somewhat inaccurate, shows the effects of inflation. as the value of money drops due to inflation, the dollar in the future may only cost 90 cents today. and to keep pace with inflation, prices of everyday things go up.

now what? how can we ensure our money don't grow mushrooms, but instead, grow more money. the answer is simple, but yet most people choose not to even give it a thought because they feel that the future is risky and uncertain. (well even any brain dead guy on the street knows that so what makes you think you are special?)

investment opportunities gives you the ability to keep pace with inflation, and at the same time, grow your money. the earlier you invest, the more money you will have in the future. this is simple math: compounding interest. a sound investment allows for a person to effectively grow his money over long periods of time, and hence when the future arrives at his or her doorsteps, he or she will have much more than what was being put in. a theoretical figure would be an investment of $4,000 per annum at a return rate of 7%-8% annually. in about 40 years, say when you retire, you'd probably be joining the high net worth people.

however, with returns comes risks as well. the thought of risk put many people off, because most of us live in fantasy-land where we think low risk can generate high returns. boys and girls, time to wake up ok? the risks involved in investments can be properly managed, and minimised through various means. hence, an investment portfolio usually has risk management systems to allow for investors to sleep with a sound mind and a clean smelling pillow at night.

at such times, the banks, are just like a safe box. spiders live in safe boxes. so start your investments early. for more information regarding investment opportunities, strategies and products, my msn channels are open.

technical analysis for this week

2008-06-23T22:23:00.003+08:00

since i'm still currently being bogged down by tonnes of work and studies, i can't seem to find time to trade as of yet. but rest assure, i'll continue during the next week if the market permits, and at the same time, share my trading strategies as well as my profits and losses.

this time round, i'll give a more comprehensive analysis on the two stocks i'm watching. first up would be SGX.

from today's close, the share prices were at 7.19, down 0.96% from the day's open to close off in the red. for the past month, the stock has been trading below its 10, 20 and 50 day EMA, sparking a continuous downward movement since then. between the period of april 20 to may 20, a head and shoulders formation was seen, where the last shoulder triggered the downwards spiral from then on. a clear support can be seen at the 8.00 mark, where the share prices consolidated before the drop in the RSI triggered the breakout in support levels. the same can almost be said for the 7.50 support, where a short term consolidation was proceeded with another loss in momentum to carry the share price further downhill.

looking now at stochastic readings, both fast and slow stochastics a looming down on the oversold levels, and RSI readings shows a cutting below the 20% mark. can't really pick out much from MACD readings, just that it still remains below the signal line and would most likely remain so.

outlook for this week would be again, negative. 7.00 didn't seem to prove to be much of a strong support in the past, but this week may see a testing of the support. since the price is currently about 2% above the support, i won't advise going long for puts as of yet. for those who loves risks, you may consider going for a higher leverage on your instruments, or warrants, which has a high gearing and low conversion ratio.

now let us take a look at one heck of a volatile stock, and one of my favourites, Capitaland.

from today's close, the share prices were at 5.81, down 4.44% from the day's open to close off in the red. for the past month or so, the stock has been trading below its 10, 20 and 50 day EMA, sparking a continuous downward movement since then. between the period of april to early may, a triple top formation was seen, where the last spike triggered the downwards spiral from then on. last friday saw a huge upward spike in the share price, not sure what it reacted to but it was the much needed retracement for the continuation of the downward trend.

looking now at stochastic readings, both fast and slow stochastics a remains noisy in the oversold region, and RSI readings shows a downward movement, probably heading for the 20% mark. can't really pick out much from MACD readings, just that it still remains below the signal line and would most likely remain so. the spike in the stochastics is my much needed indication of a downward continuation. the stochastics react very quickly to price fluctuations, however, RSI still shows a downward movement. this would indicate that the stock doesn't have the momentum for recover, but the spike in the stochastics is actually giving the stock prices a further downward push for the week.

my verdict on this: very good! gong long on puts would definitely help during the week, as a further movement to the 5.60 mark and below is highly likely. now is the perfect time to go long on your put warrants, hopefully you'll make some money this week. i believe that the share price may retreat to levels of about 5.40 to 5.50, a good 10% drop or so from today's price.

Have a good trade week ahead guys, and hopefully you could make some profits on Capitaland.

quick update on stocks

2008-06-15T22:47:00.004+08:00

ok before i got off for a 3-day retreat out in no man's land, i'll get going with an updated on my 2 favourite stocks.

SGX closed off this week in the red and has a consistent downtrend for the past 2 weeks. nothing much can be said at the point of time, but the only thing that can be said is that it is a good time to put the puts into action. follow the trend until it faces a reversal. currently, a near term reversal seems unlikely, and this coming week will be downward trending.

my best guess would be that by the end of this coming trade week, the prices may close near the 7.00 mark. investor strength is weak and confidence doesn't seem to be at a high. my call: long over puts, or go short over mother share (for risk loving junkies).

now with Capitaland, the same applies. nothing much can be said. however, a close below 5.80 may signal a further downtrend to come for the week. and from what we've seen so far, a near term reversal may not be coming in pretty soon. so we shall just follow the downtrend and ride it till it runs out of steam.

the trade week may see the prices drop down to the 5.50 mark, or below. my call: long over puts or short over mother share (again, for risk loving junkies).

i just want to clear the air of mystery over short-selling. the main reason why people are so averse to the idea of shorting stocks is because of the relatively short cover period as deemed by SGX. usually, the position must be covered by the end of the day, and if not covered within 3 working days, SGX will cover your position at 2 ticks higher. however, shorting is nothing but the reverse of any long position for an intra-day traders. i guess we as singaporeans are still risk averse and finds the idea of shorting a taboo. personally, i've made money from all my short positions.

anyways, cheers and have a good trade week!

a story of dreams

2008-06-13T00:10:00.000+08:00

dear. a house at the crest of the field. on the horizon are hills that rolls over an eternity. the gray clouds hang low on the sky's edge, cascading down a blanket of fog that seems to devour the curvy landscape.

the skies are gray, and tiny drops of rain strikes mother earth with a gentle touch. it is as though the heavens are crying, not because of sorrow but because of an overwhelming sense of joy. the pitter patter of the droplets keep in tune with our beating hearts, now, they beat as one.

loving each other's embrace we gazed deeply into each other's eyes. we forget. yes we left behind all that was attached, our families, our friends, and our lives. we started fresh, fresh from the day we ran away from the world. the world that shackled us and plays poker on our very existence. he seemed to be winning all the time, but now, he is at our mercy.

a house, and a life together, a dream that seems to always whisper in my ears and cast faint shadows that i can barely make out. a dream that was once a wish. but a wish that still is, a wish.

an excerpt from "a story of dreams" by ms demon in exit

technical analysis for week 02/06 to 06/06

2008-06-06T22:47:00.002+08:00

back again with some analysis of the stocks of SGX and Capitaland this week. as always, let's begin with the stock that helped me made money from my first ever trade.

the market week began, well not surprisingly, with a very low trade volume. SGX began the week with a very weak start. throughout the week, the share price closed very near its strong resistance of 8.00. consolidation is definitely occurring here as the prices have no general direction and prefers to hover around the support levels. with a very weak market activity as ween with the relatively low volume of trading occurring this week, it is no surprise that the prices remain stagnant at the end of each day.

currently, analysis of the indicators doesn't prove to be of much use as there are no clear long or short signals. with almost a flat line this week, the trend for next week is as smoky as my camp's smoking corner. then again, no point predicting trends.

Capitaland did just what i had expected due to its lower open on monday, and that is retreating back to its strong support of 6.20. this is a rather strong support level . even when trading volume remained low, prices are still rebounding off this support level. again, the retreat to support was interrupted by a spike in price on thursday.

technical geeks may want to consider a possibility of a rectangle formation. if volume remains low throughout the trading range of 6.20 and 6.50, a spike in volume might result in the eventual breakout of the support. however, this is purely speculative and the trend should be monitored for another week or two. day traders for highly geared Capitaland warrants are still happy due to the volatility of this stock.

well, nothing much to say at least for the week. its 3 weeks since my last trade and i can't wait to get back in the hot seat.

PS: for those who are keen in investment opportunities, avoid the equity market for the time being due to the stagnant market and high inflation rates. speculation on equities via technical analysis is very risky and not for the risk adverse. for help on investment advice, feel free to approach a me or any trading representative.

outlook of this week's trade

2008-06-02T23:17:00.003+08:00

both SGX and Capitaland didn't put up much of a show today, closing lower than the previous close. Capitaland dipped 3.1% to close at 6.35 while SGX dipped 0.2% to close at 8.02.

for Capitaland, 6.50 may prove to be quite a resistance that needs a great deal of strength just to sustain a breakout. the close up on last friday didn't have enough steam to carry the prices up, hence a fall of 3.1% is seen today. currently, there are no possible trend that can be seen except for a high chance of a retreat to support at 6.20, or a consolidation phase between 6.50 and 6.20.

SGX on the other hand seems to be very weak nowadays, with price difference between previous close and the days close not being too far apart. this is kind of rare to be seen from a somewhat volatile stock in my opinion. currently at the 8.02 levels, i feel that it would still linger around the 8.00 support levels. a breaking of support at this level would indicate further downside for the stock, however, nothing much can be said about how the prices may move in the weeks to come. traders who strongly believe that 8.00 is where strong support comes in may choose to buy, however, there are no signs of any upward trend at the moment.

and yet, i would say another bleak weak for the stocks today. i was thankful i didnt go long for Capitaland as my senses told me to hang on and read the telltale signs from today's close.

oh let it be when the upward trend comes, a gold bar would drop on my head, crude oil would gush out of my toilet when i press flush, and grains of rice starts pouring out of my shower head.

trust

2008-06-01T19:03:00.003+08:00

we are all born as skeptics. as to how much skepticism we have in us, it varies. some of us tend to trust strangers better than others. i've learnt to be less of a skeptic, not that being skeptical isn't good, but at times, it can be damaging.

true, there are unscrupulous people out there out to trick you of your money. but some people are out there, just doing your job, probably needing your help in return. sometimes, we have to lower our heads, swallow our pride and trust these people.

trust isn't an easy thing, especially for those people who got their fingers burnt before. but that doesn't stop you from trusting.

sometimes a little risk in our lives is a good thing. risks let us step outside of our comfort zone to explore ourselves deep within. being skeptical is being overly risk adverse. asking dumb questions like "will i get paid doing this?" or "will he cheat me out of my money?" or maybe "what do i get out of this?".

i don't know. honestly, i'm a risk loving person, because i can assess risk very quickly. but for those who are afraid and continues to be skeptics in their own world, please buck up, and don't fuck yourselves up.

more technical analysis

2008-05-31T15:20:00.004+08:00

at the close of this week's session, we see, just as i had expected, the two stocks to fall. first of all, lets take a look at SGX.

as a result of the weakening market conditions, SGX stocks continued its downtrend, breaking support levels on one of the days to close below the 8.00 mark. however, it managed a slight come back and ended of the week's session closing at 8.04. from this, we can see that 8.00 is a relatively strong resistance, and further consolidation around this mark may be seen for the week ahead.

next resistance is coming in at around 8.50 levels if the stock can break out of its consolidation. a few factors may be needed. one would be investor interest. currently we can see a low trade volume over the past week, with a peak at about 12 million shares traded during one of the days. a surge in trading volume, or to better put it, buying volume, would cause a significant mark up in share prices, and help to reverse the downward trend. this is at least till it reaches its 8.50 resistance, where i believe a more significant influence is required to push the prices upwards. secondly, we might need to have a strong sentiment across the board of investors. currently the STI has been fighting the bear for the past couple of trading days, and that SGX is somewhat lagging. However, i do believe that the somewhat bullish feel in the market may be short lived and i'd be cautious about going long at the moment, at least until the consolidation phase is over.

as for trend indicators, the RSI is showing a growing strength, and an upwards gradient. fast stochastics are eagerly cutting above the signal already. however, a sustained positive from the RSI and a confirmation from the slow stochastics would be what i need before going long on the stocks. one thing to also look at is trading volume. historically, surges have been accompanied with a spike in trading volume, about 17 million shares to be traded in a day to indicate a bullish movement in the prices.

eagerly bullish investors may want to keep a close eye on this stock so as to not miss the upward trend. for the bears, you might want to get the bull costumes ready.

next up, we look at Capitaland. the trading week saw the prices testing out its 6.20 resistance level but did not close below that. the few days before the end of the week saw the share prices climbing up, closing on friday above its 6.50 resistance at 6.55. i wouldn't say that the prices are going to continue its uptrend yet, because if 6.50 proves to be a resistance, consolidation may appear at this stage.

next resistance after 6.50 would come in at about 6.80. however, trading volume has been rather week with an average of about less than 10 million shares traded each day during the past week. the stock may not have enough momentum to carry it on upwards in my opinion. however, RSI and stochastics shows the contrary. both stochastics showing a positive cut in the signal line, and RSI is showing a positive gradient and creeping up slowly to the hovering 50% mark.

having retreat below its 50-day EMA, i would feel that the next week may be a good week for the stock. a clear indication of stochastics surging above the 20% mark would certainly indicate a buy signal, and a sustained open above 6.50 would make the week's trading session an interesting one.

in my opinion, a positive open in monday's trading session would indicate a buy signal for me. prices may surge up to the 6.80 mark during the week, but in order to have a convincing surge above that resistance level, an increase in trading volume might be needed, along with a positive investor sentiment with regards to the property, the stock, and the broad market. this is another stock the bulls may want to get their eyes on.

also, do keep up to date with the market happenings. with US likely to hit a recession (according to alan greenspan) and the moody sentiment of the local market, a slight uplift may not necessarily be a sustained one.

for the weight watchers

2008-05-28T23:04:00.002+08:00

to date i've lost about 2.5kg since 2 weeks ago. i guess that was when i really started watching what i ate and trained a little bit harder. for those of you keen on knowing how, i can share a few pointers.

firstly, watch what you eat. cut down on oily food like chicken drumlets deep fired in batter (wow), too much read meat, chicken skin (every body's favourite when it comes to KFC), and probably avoid fast food too. focus on eating greens (avoid frying vegetables in too much oil), white meat (fishes and chickens are good) and a suitable amount of carbohydrates from bread and rice. generally i'd stay stay off rice (or eat less of it) and substitute it with bread. note that if you caloric expenditure per day of training is around about 3000cal, you may try consuming lesser calories per day.

here's a site that gives you a rough gauge of how to calculate daily caloric intake:
http://www.hpathy.com/healthtools/calories-need.asp

next, up your caloric expenditure. eating less does help your body to not store excess calories that are unused into fats over time. however, do train hard and smart. for me, i'd go with HIIT, high intensity interval trainings. one way of doing this is that you could sprint or run at 80%-90% max effort for about 5 minutes, and then jog at 30%-40% max effort for the same period of time. depending on your threshold and tolerance, you may adjust it to suit your threshold. in conjunction with that, regular visits to the gym would also help. for general workout, go for about 60% of 1 repetition max with about 10-12 repetitions. 1 rep max means that the maximum mass you could do with perfect form, but only for just one repetition. for bigger muscles, go for lower reps with 80%-85% 1 rep max.

lastly, the most important key to losing weight and sculpting that perfect body is discipline. sure, at times you are just plain lazy. you'd tell yourself that you would maybe go for a 10km run instead of a 5km interval training. and you may also say that there's another day to train since i'm rather tired today. and you may say that "oh i didn't eat much yesterday, so i'd reward myself with a nice drumstick from kfc". or maybe you would say "just abit of that char kway teow won't do me harm". bullocks!

enjoy boys and girls. i still have about 2.5kg to go.

it's a monday hey

2008-05-26T22:56:00.002+08:00

it seems that singapore's GDP is slowing down and inflation rates are up to 7.5%. in addition, oil prices are very unforgiving. imagine, $2.10 per litre of fuel, with a full tank of 50 litres that would equate to about $105 (or about $80-$90) per refuel. and with a fuel consumption of 10km per litre (sometimes even as low as 8km-9km per litre), driving just got a little bit scarier.

outlook for stocks this week as i've mentioned are not optimistic. it is highly likely that most would be suffering from a correction, maybe down as much as 10%-20% from this year's high.

enough of that, i'd just like to point out the importance of customer service, especially here in singapore where people tend to cut you no slack. having worked in sales, some customers are nice, and tend to chit chat with you at times. but i guess i was the one initiating the chit chat cos i was bored.

now switching to the customer's perspective, i would definitely not like to be bothered when i'm browsing. actually, i won't mind if you were to talk to me about other stuff, rather than "these are going off at 20% off its usual price" or "these ones are imported from pakistan, which were previously made in china, shipped by the indians, blah blah blah". come on sales people, know how to approach your customers because no two people are alike. probably some jokes would lighten the mood, but i don't think it'll work well with an old auntie that has the look of a bulldog suffering from rabies.

apart from retail, selling your products such as insurance, investment funds, or being a recruitment consultant, also require good customer service. recently i was being contacted by a recruitment consultant that was going to schedule an interview for me, and guess what, never heard from her since yesterday evening after confirming with her the time of my interview. best of all, i don't have a damn idea where to go! bravo!

well i guess screw that. i'm kinda bored so i'm looking for jobs instead of watching the market all the time. and of cos muay thai and my upcoming fight which i think i'm gonna get my leg chopped to bits.

sleep time.

some technical analysis

2008-05-25T22:40:00.003+08:00

focusing on SGX stocks this week, we see a relatively poor performance, dropping around about 6% to 7% since it opened on tuesday. looking at the 6-month and 3-month chart, the 10-day EMA line has barely cut the 20-day EMA downwards, and quite possibly cutting the 50-day EMA as well. on chart analysis, i can see that support level at 8.50 has been breached as the shares closed at 8.38. next support level would probably come at the 8.00 mark. very strong resistance can be seen at the 9.00 mark as the share prices tested this level on 3 separate occasions.

we can see that the RSI are just kissing the 50% mark, and haven't really made any significant movement downwards. coupled with fast and slow stochastic readings just cutting below the 20% mark, and a weakening MACD histogram, i would probably need a significant indication from my RSI to ring my bell.

relatively bullish and risk-adverse investors might want to wait till the downward trend sees its demise probably after testing the 8.00 support level. eagerly bullish traders might want to get a significant indication from stochastics and RSI. however, in my opinion, the share prices are basically lost and confused (side-trending) and would probably favour the risk-loving intra-day traders.

moving on to Capitaland, as with most of the other stocks this week, the volatile stock closed down about 7% since its open on tuesday. its 10-day EMA already showed a convincing downwards cutting of the 20-day EMA, and by the looks of it, would probably cut the 50-day EMA. this is a relatively good indication for all the bears out there. historically over the past couple of months we can see supports coming at around about 6.50 and 6.80, and resistance at 7.10. last week, it could not sustain a convincing move over its 6.80 resistance after moving down and testing the 6.50 support early this month and hence, has a high chance of testing its 6.20 support.

RSI levels are looming below the 50% mark, showing no direction at the moment, and coupled with fast and slow stochastics below the 20% mark, prices look bleak for this week. for followers of the MACD histogram, it just moved into negative territory, giving more indications that the 6.20 support may be coming.

bullish investors can sleep awhile longer as i cant really foresee any upward movement of this stock this coming week. as for traders, the current price is relatively close to its 6.20 support and my guess is that it might be consolidating around the current price for this coming week.

i guess that if sentiments were to play a huge part for the market next week, both stocks may see a short term upward rise. however, with the gloomy world news circulating nowadays, slowing GDP and all, i'd probably stay as bear.

wow and all psyched up

2008-05-21T22:41:00.003+08:00

today's training was madness. but i guess that was how i was feeling. energetic during the pre warm-up 3.2km run, tyre jumps and skipping. then it came to some bagwork, some padwork with alvin, more bagwork, more padwork (till my calf cramped up), then bagwork again, and to end it off, clinch techniques. and now my neck hurts like mad.

what got me all psyched up was that alvin opened up an invitation for a fight coming up at the end of june. apparently they have it every end-of-the-month but not for this month. gosh i'm pretty much psyched up right now. 28th june! its kick or be kicked...

however, i seem to be at a slight disadvantage: weight. yes boys and girls, if you guess my weight, you'd only get it wrong. it's been hovering about the 71kg mark like a volatile stock market, even going up to 72kg last week. but thankfully i managed to drop some of it, and currently at 70kg. imagine if i were to go up with another 70kg plus guy, i think i might be knocked senseless cos no beginner weighs that much. but my ultimate goal is either 67kg or 68kg, and i think that's probably the max i can go before the body fat levels drop to below 8-10%.

well, i guess it's gonna be a challenge, a fun one at least. anything too tasty is bad. and if i don't want to get killed, i better shed my ass off.

product review: mentalk

2008-05-19T23:05:00.003+08:00

normally i won't ever think of doing any product review (since they may be controversial in nature) but i guess it is worth a shot.

mentalk is an all natural herbal candy that boasts significant benefit with little or no side effects for its user. at first glance, i was taken aback because i never tried any candy that has ginseng in it, let alone any candy that isn't meant for a child. i decided to test this candy out during the span of one week of my muay thai training, hoping to either get a kick or get kicked.

the first day of consumption (saturday):
in the morning i had a game of football. an intense 2 to 3-hour session with intervals of sprints and stops. i had suffered from a few minor injuries after the session: aching of my right knee, aching of my right ankle (probably due to the torn atfl) and sore feet. i consumed the candy in the afternoon after my nap but of course, effects do not come that quickly.

second day of consumption (sunday):
as a disclaimer, i was told that it was going to "awake the ache". meaning i will tend to feel sore on parts of my body that were previously injured. the day went by normally, no new aches or pains apart from the sores i got from football the day before. i ate the candy in the afternoon.

third day of consumption (monday):
training day. i ate the candy about an hour before my training commenced. training began with warm-up: 2.4km run (10:30-11:30), static tyre jumps (5:00), skipping (10:00) and bagwork (10:00). then we went into 5 sets of 1-minute bagwork, 100 kicks on each leg on pads, and some padwork punching. that was intense. somehow i felt that my energy levels were somewhat moderately normal during my bagwork and padwork, but endurance levels during the run was certainly greater than the previous week of training.

fourth day of consumption (wednesday):
i skipped tuesday cos i wanted to see if the candy would give me the boost for that day's training. one thing i noticed when i woke up was that the sore on my right knee felt horribly worse than before. i couldn't even walk properly for most parts of the day. it hurts as though it had been hit by a jackhammer.

again i ate the candy about an hour before training. this time for warm up i did 3.2km run, skipping (15:00) and bagwork (10:00). then we had a 45-minute long session of bagwork: 3 sets of 1-minute combo punches, 50 single roundhouse kicks per leg on bags, 30 double roundhouse kicks per leg on bags, 10 continuous roundhouse kicks per leg on bags, 50 knees per leg on bags, and to end it off, 3 minute of alternate knees on bags, continuous. yes, very intense indeed but amazingly i wasn't at all gasping and crawling on the ground after the whole session. my energy levels were pretty much still up and i was able to do some more.

now to summarise the effectiveness of the candy, i'd keep it short and sweet.

pros:

increased energy levels during training (at least that's what i felt)
for guys, it is really quite good (if you know what i mean)
doesn't make you thirsty (because supplements usually make you pee like a dog and you have to drink like an elephant in order not to dehydrate)

cons:

aching and headache (though i only felt the aching on the 4th day and headache on the 6th day)
the taste of ginseng (for those who can't stand the taste of that dreaded root)

my personal opinion:
different people may react differently to external stimuli and supplements. i can safely say i'm quite a hardy beast and can handle high levels of potency. however, for some of you who are weaker, you may feel the full blow of the side effects way earlier. and as for the benefits, trust me, whether you come from ocs or commando, doing the routine i did may just floor you (unless you've been doing it for a few months). for those who are open to natural herbs as a form of supplement (be it for sports or for other activities), you may want to try this out.

for more infor, visit http://www.mentalk2u.com/

a dull day for kindness

2008-05-12T15:34:00.005+08:00

i seem to can't wait for mondays and wednesdays to come. cos i get to punch bags and pads of course! and sheesh its only half past three, another 2 more hours till training starts and i just can't wait. sometimes i wish i had training 3 or 4 times a week, at least that'll give me something to do in the evenings. i just can't stand staying at home, doing nothing and essentially stoning during most of my time spent.

recently i had an unpleasant encounter of the worst kind. a rude old inconsiderate lady who refused to hold the lift for me. sheesh. i was fuming mad after i realised she was holding on the the "door close" button from inside. and i must say i looked like a fool pressing the "door open" button repeatedly from the outside.

come to think of it, many of us would experience this quite often. and to be honest, i've always held the lift for someone who seems to be rushing for the door. i can't imagine why the old lady couldn't do the same. maybe she thinks i'm a robber?

so much for the friendly lion that wears a red shirt:

maybe we are still at this phase:
when will we ever learn to change...

addiction of the next order

2008-05-01T01:07:00.002+08:00

yesh muay thai is like my drug. seriously. i was truly in pain for the whole of today's training session. my shoulders felts like they had daggers sticking out from them and my triceps felt like they had been cut up into shreds.

i even had problems holding up the kick pads high enough. it felt as though they weigh as heavy as a freaking medicine ball. and when i held up the focus mitts as they were being punched, goodness how my shoulders would scream "AH F*@%!!!" i cant even put my guard up properly... sheesh.

and in the end we did pushups. on a fine and dandy day i can do up to forty in one shot. no kick. i did one today and had my face smacked onto the floor.

yeah, just like a drug. you are hooked, but you just gotta bear the pain that comes after.

thanks for the burpees

2008-04-29T10:04:00.002+08:00

bah. yesterday's training was the toughest so far.

it began with a total body warmup, 2 minute interval with as many superman burpees as possible. come to think of it, i should have just done 10 per interval. but i wanted to push, so i did about 25 each.

then came bagwork. by then my shoulders were screaming "NO NO STOP" and i could've swore the bag was laughing at me saying "Is that all you got?" 3 sets of the 3 minute drill.

next was the kicks. my favourite, until it came to "OK, we'll do 100 kicks per leg." i thought it was alright, but by the time we finished with the right round houses, something new was given.

now it was doing punches. 2 sets of 3 minute double jabs, 1 set of 3 minute jab plus hook, 1 set of 3 minute double left hook, and finally ended off with a set of 3 minute straight punch plus uppercut combo. at the end of it all, i had trouble trying to scratch my damn nose.

and eventually, training ended with a kick exercise, kicking each other's arm, gently... right kicks, left kicks, switching kicks...

however i decided to stay on and do an additional 10 minutes worth of bagwork, left jab right hook, left jab straight right, left jab right roundhouse. and now, come to think of it, i shouldn't have done that.

i woke up today, barely able to bend my arms at the elbows. yes, pain, thanks to the superman burpees. gosh i can barely lift up anything even now. so please children, take care of ye hands while they still work fine, who knows you may need then to scratch ye nose or the back of ye neck.

thanks for the burpees ah.

on a lighter note

2008-04-24T23:30:00.002+08:00

yes finally it rained today! a good day to laze and daydream but i had to go to NUS for a medical checkup. yes, waste of precious lazing time but oh well...

anyways i got myself new gloves! and wraps too!

who works for free?

2008-04-05T13:14:00.002+08:00

all around the world, people are working round the clock. non-stop business meetings, corporate objectives, data entry, computing, and the list just goes on and on. people want to go to work. they want to, and it's not a joke. why would someone want to spend their life away being a slave to the macintosh or notebook, sipping coffee to keep the sleep fairies away, and at the 5 o'clock mark, start rushing home for dinner?

the answer is money.

honestly speaking would you work without money? let's say work for free? if you say yes, i say screw you boy.

it apparently seems that i have issues with many things these days, but the reality behind this is scary but true. there are 3 groups of people in the working class (instead of the blue collar and the white collars and what people normally interpret).

the lowest band are those who never wants to put in any effort in working (i.e. making money) and are contented with trying to eke out a living, support a family and probably do this till they finally expire (by expire i think you know what it means).

the middle band are made up of most of us, those slaves that sit in front of machines, telling machines what to do and earning an average income. average, i emphasise. probably with the average monthly household income of about 6.8k a month, each head would probably contribute an average of 3.4k. wow 3.4k is alot... probably seemed alot when i was in kindergarten but not anymore.

the sad truth about some of these people are that they are contented with their jobs, because they have a steady (and safe) source of income. like any typical singaporean who are afraid of ventures and risks. job security is prime due to the need to raise their children and maintaining a family. in my honest opinion, some of them really do want a pay increment, but just cant be bothered to look elsewhere for opportunities because they have been sitting down on their lazy assess on the comfort zone couch.

and of course the crust, the creme de la creme, made up of top executives (top, i emphasise), CEOs, directors and the list goes on. these are people who work hard and rise up the ladder because they don't want to get pooped on when they have someone else higher up the ladder. either that or it is just a family business that has been handed down. competitive, determination, dedication, hard work, you name it.

and of course i'm looking at us young adults nowadays, probably teens that are entering adulthood. wasting our lives away on short term materialistic ideals and baloney dreams that are thought off on the couch watching serials. i believe that there cannot be any time sooner than now.

sick sad little world

2008-03-21T16:29:00.002+08:00

in this modern day and age, singaporean parents are spoiling their children. gone were the days to corporal punishment, throwing of books out of the window and temporary body arts from the scars of the feather duster on the bodies of their children. true, society is evolving, but are we more socially intelligent than our ancestors? in singapore, well... its up to you to decide...

lately i've been having problems finding students to tutor. to increase my chances of getting a student, i applied through 4 agencies, hoping to increase the "strike" percentage (of cos, this is simple math/probability) but the results are abysmal. 3 months running and no "strikes". sigh... maybe i'm just running out of luck...

when it comes to tutors, males are seen as sex predators. so generally, old fashioned simple minded parents (simpletons) prefer female tutors over male tutors because well they think their 9 year old kid looks like those from america's next top model. personally, i rather take 10 glances and drool over the models than a 9 year old. and to all you sick bastards out there, have a life (i mean the paedophiles).

also when parents are fine with male tutors, they quote another specific requirement: chinese. not being racist but what about those not born chinese? is it God's cruel fate? why does this requirement even exist? it would be understandable to have the requirement "chinese speaking" but segregating us by our skin colours is crossing the fine line of equality of all races. and no i'm not trying to stir the harmony of the nation, i'm sending a wake up call to tuition agencies that this isn't the way to do things.

oh what am i saying. nothing gets trough the mind of a traditional typical singaporean.

:)

i'm chinese by the way.

the rain and his birthday

2008-03-01T10:54:00.002+08:00

the perfect ambiance for a 21st birthday, or any other birthday for that matter. or for any lovely occasion. overcast skies blankets the world you know, wave after wave of rain pours down from the heavens above, and everything around you is given the gray tint. absolutely lovely i must say.

at times like this i would like to relive my inner childhood moments: standing and dancing merrily in the rain, getting totally drenched, enjoy a nice warm shower and lying down on a beach chair underneath a huge beach umbrella, enjoying a nice warm cup of espresso. well the espresso part wasn't very 'child-like' tough.

simple birthdays, simple life, and the next day would unveil the sick sad reality of this game called life.

wars and adventures

2008-02-08T23:36:00.001+08:00

according to our most dreaded history books, the first world war was caused by many factors, some of which include the decades of antagonism leading up to the eruption of the conflict, and of course the assassination of archduke franz ferdinand (not the band) of austria-hungary. but i guess many of us would have overlooked the fact that the first world war was in fact, not between testosterone enriched men, but between men and women.

countless of wars have been fought, and till this day, much has been unchanged. from the flying pots and silverware, and the slurry of cuss words that propagate through the air like microwaves, these are the weapons of man's destruction. i truly wonder when this neverending struggle of who's right or who's wrong will cease, but i guess i just have to wait till the day finally comes.

on a lighter note, i feel the sudden rush for the need of an adventure. be it rock climbing, wall climbing, climbing buildings, trekking, the ourdoors... you name it, i crave for it. this symptom may probably be due to the fact that i've actually been growing leaves and berries on me for the past 8 weeks or so. and thinking back to the army days, gosh, i wish i was doing it all over again. all the physical torture (done to the trainees of course) and the outdoors, the trees never looked so green before.

anyways there's this great series on discovery channel that i honestly reckon most of you would enjoy. its called 'man vs wild' and it is about a man (edward michael grylls or better known as bear grylls) who puts himself in many of survival situations that you can possibly think of, and gets out of them alive. i especially love the parts where he catches trout or salmon from the river, and eat them straight out of the river, just like a bear (no pun intended). he says he loves sushi, so do i!

oh well i hope one day i'll be stranded somewhere out there, having to apply all that i've learnt from him and his show, and manage to get out of it in one perfect piece.

the locomotion

2008-01-27T01:02:00.000+08:00

i truly wonder why the female gender has a tendency to spill over their troubles onto other people. well it is kind of like having your pants poured with iced water. oh well not really. but the point is, it is like those mini fengshui fountains you may have in your house that spills water from one level to another. but this time, instead of the good fengshui water, you get the water that pours down from a hurricane's storm. so to those guys out there who share the same fate, i truly feel for you...

on a lighter note, with my mum going away to KL, i have been given the opportunity to flaunt my culinary skills (since i don't have girls coming over to my house begging me to cook for them). i was rather proud of myself having made my 'sunshine toasts' this morning, well on saturday morning at least. simple to make and of course, simply delicious! here's a picture of them:

they're only nice when eaten while the bread is hot and toasted. i ate them when they were no longer hot though. a tad soggy but still tasted good. have i got your mouths watery?

anyways i still gotta wait till my brother gets back from thailand. and now i'm stuck in the airport with nothing to do but this.

cooking tips

2008-01-21T22:08:00.000+08:00

do you put your soy sauce in your egg mixture before frying it, or do you add your soy sauce after you fry your eggs?

do you coil your earphones around your ipod, or do you 'orbit' your ipod around your earphones so that it the earphones are coiled up?

i tend to neither add soy sauce before frying nor after frying. and have no preference to how i'd like my earphones coiled. weird.

anyways, about the eggs, if you want to have them scrambled, you must first know how to make those scrambled eggs. scrambled eggs (those good ones) are generally not fully cooked. meaning that the egg proteins are not fully coagulated (or for those who are mentally challenged, it means to turn into a solid mass or to curdle as the protein structure changes). just like those eggs that you get from buying your big breakfast at macdonalds, i bet you are wondering how you could actually make them so delicious. right?

firstly, adding ingredients to your egg mixture will slow down the cooking of the eggs. you have impurities in your egg mixture which prevents quick coagulation of the protein. one way to best slow down the cooking process is to add ingredients a couple of seconds after pouring your egg mixture into your frying pan. and do make sure it is on low heat. say you wanted to add milk, what you can do is to pour the milk into the frying pan (lightly oiled) after having your egg mixture poured into the pan.

the above process 'shocks' the cooking, thus slowing down the rate at which the egg protein coagulate. and it doesn't just stop there. continue to stir, yes stir, the mixture in the frying pan so that you wont allow the protein to coagulate quickly. and of course, depending on your culinary skills, your eggs could turn out excellent, or equivalent to either a 20 year old yogurt or the rocks at the beach.

incubus, live in singapore

2008-01-14T12:53:00.000+08:00

yes and indeed. after all these while. they might have missed us, a tiny red dot just off the southern tip of the malaysian peninsular. and as any die hard incubus fan, i just had to get the tickets.

actually to be honest i knew of their tour when a good friend of mine told me all about it quite some time back. i was pretty much excited when i heard about it. but well it had to be at fort canning, not that i don't like the venue, but i'd rather have the concert in a concert hall where i can choose good seats near the front. i wont even mind the deafening sounds from the speakers and amps.

i would really appreciate it if they'd play some songs from make yourself and morning view, of course morning view being my favourite album by incubus. maybe they'll play make yourself, nice to know you, pardon me, just a phase and all that. but i guess they'd be playing mostly from light grenades and a crow left of the murder.

and for those of you who don't already know, what are you waiting for. incubus, live in singapore. 7th of march 2008, fort canning park. tickets are out a long long time ago. get it in february and it'll be a bit more expensive.

see you there.

a craze swept wave

2008-01-13T19:58:00.000+08:00

time and time again i see hordes of customers lining up to purchase their favourite doughnuts, or donuts as what most of you would know it by. it leave me wondering when, and where did the whole craze sprout out from. of course i couldn't be bothered researching it, but my hunches would say that it would have probably started with japan. or maybe one of the asian countries.

one of the reasons doughnuts became so popular is because we singaporeans are not exposed to a spread of fancy doughnuts that the americans indulge in every single day of their lives. also credit must be given to the advertisements and publicity. but this cannot solely be credited to one company alone. just like the bubble tea craze, many other doughnut-copy-companies are coming out of nowhere with their fanciful names and trademark recipes. its no wonder why singaporeans are so spoilt for choice.

it made me think again. doughnuts were actually introduced to this country more than a decade ago. for those of you who are at least my age or older, you would have remembered dunkin donuts. dunkin donuts were like the in-thing of the 1990s here, at least for me i guess. i still remembered gorging down those strawberry cream doughnuts, chocolate coated, rainbow rice and honey glazed. however, nowadays, we have cheese, kaya and whatever you may think of. to me, they appear scary and very experimental but has seem to struck a chord with the masses.

myself, although a food junkie, i'm not particularly crazy over doughnuts. so far, my doughnut count since the craze started still lingered at 1. i realise how very unhealthy those o-shaped deep fried dough buns are, plus all the added ingredients on the top that contributes to you slow demise. i've been constantly reminding others how unhealthy these things are, and of course, are as unhealthy as your favourite hawker food.

and of course you don't eat your hawker food that often, why should you eat these miniature life buoys as often? the queues don't seem to get any shorter and the fanaticism for doughnuts never seem to die. i guess i'll never know what it will take to level the situation.

then again, i'm still a fan of the bubble tea, but if you think about it, doughnuts are like cliche.

a critic's critique

2007-12-28T02:22:00.000+08:00

i suddenly remembered that i had to write about something. a critique on customer service and it's importance. speaking for the millions out there who pays a great deal of scrutiny to the attention given to them, as well as how others treat them when they hold close to their hearts the 5 word mantra: the customer is always right.

others may have various forms of the mantra such as "the customer is your boss" or "i pay and you serve", but at the end of the day, we are all human beings and being critical is our nature.

take one case study: Banquet Food Court at Sengkang. i was queuing up to get 2 packets of fried udon for my friends who were obviously starving from food deprivation. well actually there wasn't much of a queue to be honest. however, what made it seem like a queue was the horribly delayed response from the person behind the counter. the lady, probably sick and tired of her work, rather flipped over the takoyaki balls slowly than attend to an eager customer who was going to provide her with her day's pay. so mistake number one: never let your customers wait for assistance.

okay, so i've already made my order. it was twenty minutes past two on my watch as i stood like sir stamford raffles waiting for the delicious looking udon. five, ten, and eventually fifteen minutes later, the udon was prepared. about time i say! how long could it possibly take to fry 2 packets of udon when i was the only customer? given another 5 minutes and probably i could have at least a medium rare sirloin with garlic mushroom sauce topped with baby carrots, juicy broccoli and whipped potato. i admit i was impatient, and the least i expect of the lady behind the counter was to assist me in taking a look at those udon. that was mistake number two.

somehow i started to think, maybe they needed to make those udon from scratch. and of course i am not that stupid.

and finally, mistake number three, when i was handed the "goods" there wasn't even a simple "sorry for the delay" or "i'm really sorry we had to refine the oil to make good oil to fry your udon sir" or whatever. none at all. simply put it: lack of empathy. apparently flipping takoyaki balls is like digging treasure. maybe there would be a thousand dollar note in one of the takoyaki balls on the hot plate.

and i must say, service was extremely poor.if i were to rate it on a scale of ten (which i am going to do so now), i'd give them 2 out of then. 1 point for the bare minimum standard of attending to customers (like duh) and 1 more point out of compassion.

and you didn't know i could be a critic. in fact, anyone, can be the unknowing critic.

brain aches

2007-12-26T23:51:00.000+08:00

2 days to go and she'll be home. where the one that loves her awaits her arrival. desperation. and it has been so for days. more than days.

i've been having this awfully painful headache since sunday. i can't imagine i actually endure the pain for 4 days straight. i can't even walk, or get up without feeling the pain. and even moving my eyeballs feels as though the eye sockets are laced with sandpaper.

i thought it was just the pre-fever symptom. it was, a couple of days ago as a matter of fact. but no longer. maybe its cool fever. a new strain of fever that keeps your body temperature below 37. i don't know. probably its the headache talking. i also had these crazy thoughts about how the headache may actually be tumors. er well i better not think of it anymore.

on monday i went fishing. and as usual caught nothing. the feeling sucks. yeah. but you know, fishes have tiny brains, but they are not that stupid. anyways i've found ways to improve my rate of catch the next time round. i'm gonna catch some rays and cook and eat.

i'm rather displeased that these past few days hasn't been raining as often as i wanted it to. the skies are not gray and there's just too much sunlight.

cobwebs

2007-12-21T20:07:00.000+08:00

yesterday i went fishing with some of my friends, 3 of them were my recruits. were. it's nice to see them, those familiar faces. kinda reminds me of old times. and i met up with tex. it was great to see him after all these time. nothing much has changed i guess, apart from him being able to drive and me not being able to drive legally. yet.

once again it almost rained today. i'm waiting for the sky to open up and splash us. i think there's just something in rainwater that makes me reminisce. some chemical. maybe opium.

another day almost over, and to start of the 'almost-over-day', i woke up at one in the afternoon. sheesh. i felt like crap getting out of bed and into the shower. and then i thought to myself, "saturday's football match has been postponed, today doesn't seem special, and no one gives a rat's ass about my existence." maybe that was a tad extreme. but i guess it's true.

i started thinking about how getting a job, a temporary one, seems like playing the lottery. so many application and yet no single fucked reply. i just need to get my ass moving instead of rotting at home. plus, i'm not earning any cash, so it makes me think twice about shopping. and it is killing me when i desperately want to get my les paul. frustrating, very frustrating indeed.

and its that time of the year where people start counting down to the new year, make new resolution which they hardly follow through and start their new work year, or school year, fresh. well somehow it'd be nice if say january first two thousand and eight brought along a extreme climatic change. sinapore begins to snow like the noth pole and the whole world turns into a huge ball of ice. that'd be nice. at least we get to experience snow. hmm.. nice.

argh whats this? cobwebs on my entire body! how long have i been sitting here?

painful photocopy

2007-12-20T00:00:00.000+08:00

being able to let go would mean that one has overcome his/her obstacle, challenge to troubles. well that's what i think. at least maybe a couple of years back. but i realise letting go means that you are beyond that stagnating level of maturity you've been stuck at. learning to let go of something takes a great deal of effort, maybe more of 'mental effort' than 'physical effort'. but i must admit sometimes mental pain can result in physical torture. after all, the mind and body has a subtle connection.

i went to starbucks today. with who? heh... i won't say. and i decided to go because i wanted to get away from the four walls of my house, and to get some fresh air. and also to read a book i just bought. i must say it is certainly better than reading a book at home, unless i have a personal library at home with a full time barista at my expense.

the night air was fresh, and chilly with the occasional breeze. i sat outside because i thought the air-conditioned interior would freeze my brains dry. i plucked in my ipod, blared my favourite music and indulged in my reading.

the music was great, from my ipod i mean. it was Avenged Sevenfold's latest album, Avenged Sevenfold. yes, a self titled album. funny i thought, because it is their fourth album. and usually band produce self titled albums when they release their first album. oh anyways i sidetracked.

it is indeed distracting to have people walk in front of you, and around you for that matter while you are reading. even if they were extra terrestials i'd catch a glimpse. but then there was this person that looked like you, only scrawny. other than that, the short 2 second glimpse and the side profile was uncannily similar. that shook me up a little. no, a lot. why? why must that happen. and i don't like it. its like an injection of food colouring into your brain. no actually its not but what i'm trying to bring across is that the whole mind gets so knocked up that you'd experience a 5 minute relapse.

then it got my thinking; there are indeed many people that look similar. in facial appearance at least. what they do to their bodies is, well, up to them. piercings, inkings etc. it is strange to think that you could have a clone elsewhere, but then again, with 6 billion (and steadily increasing) people in this world, you are just another photocopy of another. or maybe the other is just a photocopy of you...

and think deeper. how many centuries have past since the world was created. how many billions, no trillions, maybe bazillions of people have lived and walked the face of this earth. yup, keep counting. there's bound to be duplicates. and take for example twins. there's living, walking evidence that 2 people can actually exist on the same space-time continuum looking the same!

amazing. wow.

i spent 2 hours at starbucks. after the completion of the first chapter i decided to head on home. almost half past nine and the cold night air seemed to get even colder. oh and what about the other person?

there was no one.

punishment too great to bear

2007-12-19T13:57:00.000+08:00

the more i read, the dimmer the light becomes from the candle. a hope diminishing. saddening i feel. with so much being put into, everything will end one day.

and as the flame extinguishes, it leaves nothing but a faint trail of rising white smoke from its charred wick.

i wonder. i really wonder. i am beyond mad.

you never talked about me.

the roses, the photos, the gifts. nothing.

kuroi ame

2007-12-17T01:01:00.000+08:00

i can't help but think "it's another december". the last december i could recall... well it wasn't very pleasant. and well i'm listening to "when you were young" by the killers and all i could say that it made me recall last december with even more colour.

last december rained like it never rained before. well... i guess this december did just as well. but exactly a year ago it rained for days, no, weeks. or maybe it was just a couple of weeks, but i guess those days were somewhat bittersweet and has been etched deeply in my memories.

i would stay in bunk, waiting for lessons. the whole lot of us. fresh out of OCS. my buddies. those carefree days i would think. the one i loved left me a year ago for some strange reason. and i felt lost, like really lost. i would find excuses to go out with anyone, yes anyone. just to kill time, so i thought to myself. to put it in words, last december was gray, with some highlights and streaks of colour here and there. but mainly, it was gray, not only the skies but the world that revolved around me.

the feeling still remains. lost and undecided. but that was a year ago. so i though, again. then it made me think, "what is so different between this december and the last?" indeed. nothing much has changed. i'm still alone, just like the many decembers i can think of, rotting and decomposing, but, not lost nor undecided! a good start i say.

something is bothering me. i'm not old, neither am i that young. but i realised that youngsters nowadays have a knack for vulgarities. must be an upcoming trend. i stumbled across a group of secondary school students on board the bus on my way home and my gosh this young lady was spewing profanities like mount krakatoa when it erupted. and she liked it. and her immature friends seemed to add more lava to the profani-tastic flow.

alright enough said. i guess i'm kinda old fashioned. *$&# *$&@ @$($%!!!

for the 4th night running i can't sleep. maybe it is due to my couch potato lifestyle, always waking up at 11 or 12 for that matter.

anyone interested in hiring a guitarist? or a vocalist?

other side of the moon

2007-11-03T16:22:00.000+08:00

a series of unfortunate events before i ord. 3 extras are 'awarded' to my by my TO, in which i feel, is rather unfair. the errors were only in format, and not in content. anyways that's the army for you, no wait, that's certain army personnel for you. with rank, they think they have the powers to do anything they could never do before. i'd say fuck you! to those who use rank as means to lever yourself to be at an advantage to others, i'd say see you in the real world where the confines of the military cannot shell your insecurities from the harsh reality of life. fuck you!

just wait and see how i'm gonna serve your 3 extras boy. that is if i'm going to even serve it asshole.

and now with that aside, it seems that there have been lots of things that i've seen for the past few weeks that are worth mentioning. one would be the above mentioned. others well... its more like dissing people and in fact, it's all worth the dissing. like how going back to camp on your leave day is 'wrong' and that you should 'fuck off' when you are on leave. strange but sadly true. these people exist and it makes life more interesting to begin with.

there are also lots of things i don't think i can share, because it involves with restricted information (which would in the end land me in a huge pile of shit), or those involving people and their personal stuff. oh well it seems i got nothing else to say then...

wrong!

it seems that i've got one more month of national service left, and many years of reservist to do. let's talk about the remaining month, what i'm going to do. of course i'm going to ord with a bang, so people remember me as the lieutenant that you shouldn't mess around with, and also the lieutenant that has depth in personality and thoughts. and of course the lieutenant that has a piercing tongue and a knack for blunt comments (only for those who deserves it). well then again who do i think i am trying to lay the smack down on others? well if you don't like anyone, chances are, no one like him too. and chances are that you may hate the person i dislike are high too!

ooh i'm such an evil person, conniving and devilish. i don't think so. the other side of the moon isn't necessarily the dark side... i am just as pure as pure itself.

sun after the rain

2007-09-23T13:50:00.000+08:00

sunday, today, feels so much different than any other sundays. i guess it might probably be due to the air after the rain. the sun is finally up, and this is something i would usually dread, but today, i'm loving every single second of it.

come to think of it, i don't really have anything to do right now. there's plenty of things which i'm thinking of doing, like rollerblading (that's only if i'm staying by the beach, and have my blades with me), maybe cycling (again i'd rather cycle by the beach), watching a movie, hanging out in a cafe drinking coffee while enjoying a nice book (but i'm fasting) and well probably lots more of other things which i can't think of now. sunday is indeed a very relaxed day, no wait, today is such a relaxed day.

oh one thing i'd like to do is finish up my D.Gray-Man anime, up to episode 37, but then again, what am i going to do in camp if i were to finish them up? bah. i still got Claymore...

anyways lull period is such a bore. two plus weeks of slack more before the next batch of work.

randomness of the mind

2007-09-20T23:30:00.000+08:00

there's always a strange thing. Nothing is like what it seems. i'm not too sure either. lately it has been even stranger. i began to analyse the world we live in an even greater sense of attention. every intricacy of nature, the way things work and operate, the human psyche and our interaction with the physical world... all these sounds so profound, deep, and well, something that would come out of a 16-year old. true, i must admit to this. but what's more importantly is that i'd love to open my eyes to what the world truly has beneath this gray coat of paint.

some of the thoughts that i may had have: there are 6 billion parallel earths that exist. each individual carves out his/her own image of the world, he/she is in his/her own dimension while others are mere characters. same goes for another person, and another, and another. no matter how we look at it, your world may be different from mine because we don't share the same views and opinions. in the end, we write our own story, where we want to go and what would we want to be.

life is established as priceless. and yet, we take it for granted. we squander what was given to us and make wrong turns most of the time.

that's all for now.

reminisce

2007-08-11T20:02:00.000+08:00

there's always something that i would never forget. oh how that day plays itself over and over again in my thoughts, just like silent movie but with bright and vivid colours. that, and not forgetting the days the came after, the weeks and the months. arduous. i had to endure.

what was i thinking back then? should i have held on to her, knock some sense into her? make her realise that she was making the single most biggest mistake of her life? the fact was, i didn't. i let her go. i let her speak her mind as my eyes welled up with tears that don't seem to ever stop flowing. her words seared my empty heart as those crystal droplets lay rest on the park bench. my mind was blurred.

as she uttered the first few words, i thought to myself, gosh, it is finally happening. the end of the strain in our relationship. no more worries for both of us. then, as she continued, a totally different set of emotions sank in. she was the only one i had loved, cared for and cherished for over 3 years. the things that we've been through, the ups and downs. we practically grew up together, as well as grew on one another. but i kept silent. not knowing what to do at that point of time. she asked me why i was so silent. the only thing i could tell her was that it wasn't the first time, and what would i get from saying anything?

she parted, just like that. not a clean break. like a human body bring ripped apart, leaving the insides dangling out in the most grotesque of ways. my vision tunnelled as the grim reality started to set in. this time round, a heavy flow proceeded as my thoughts went into overdrive with a thousand memories swarming through. i got up from my seat, and stormed away.

i have never forgiven you since that day.

love shackle

2007-07-29T03:32:00.000+08:00

he cries. alone. sometimes at night, sometimes at the oddest of hours. he thinks of her, thinks of the years he has spent. beautiful memories lay stagnant in his beautiful mind, floating around as one memory intertwines with another. he is constantly reminded of her, the promises that they made, his own sacrifices, and probably everything that he has to give. all the time.

he loves her, very truly indeed. he tells himself that never had such a person made such an impact in his life before. he convinces himself that never would he want to spend his eternity with another person. he swears by the fact that she is irreplaceable, one of a kind, and God's creation for him and only for him. he knows that only he can know her inside out. he knows when she's breathing and when she's not, knows when she's happy or when she's sad. he knows every curve of her body, the heights and the depths, the wrinkles that emerge as she smiles. not to mention the scent of her skin, the warmth of her touch, the hue of her blush, and that radiant aura that bursts like a thousand supernovas when she chuckles.

in spite of all that is beautiful, he knows that there is a darker side. a side that hinders him from holding on to her. destiny has its own way of playing the devil. fate has never been on either of their sides. he is constantly bugged with the days that lie ahead, come what may. he worries, worries excessively, and is afraid of losing her. his thought hold tightly to those beautiful memories while his desires shackles his emotions so as to not let go that feeling of love.

trauma, confusion, helplessness. he begs for none of this to happen.

an excerpt by ms demon in exit

the dominant one

2007-07-21T00:06:00.000+08:00

once again, in camp. blogging from camp. sad, but otherwise a privilege given. nowadays, i'm feeling the stress. to think that once being a platoon commander in guards was hard, under my new oc was just as so. freedom to handle my own off days has been restricted, and i feel that someone is always breathing down my neck. honestly, arrows fly around looking for fresh meat to sink its sharp pointy head into. argh, hate it.

anyways it is peaceful now. and i'm loving it. wondering when will i go fishing though...

the war within

2007-07-13T17:45:00.000+08:00

he was a simple and ordinary person. but deep within him lies a dark room. a room that holds not one, but two of him. they live in harmony at times, but see conflict as part of their day to day struggle for dominance. both of them want power, the power to live the life out of their four-sided box, the power to control, and the power to influence.

it is a struggle that he has to live with. the decisions that he has to make, the actions that he chooses and the path that he takes. above him looms the air of uncertainty, the shroud of confusion that blocks his judgement. he says it is hard being him. and yes, some do agree. but he brought it upon himself. he was naive, never did look past the dark clouds above.

until lately, he was drawn too deep into the web of life. entangled and with nowhere to go to, he has only his friends around to provide him company, but only for the time being. once away from them, his mind falls and sinks into the darkness, into the room where they bicker and quarrel over power and control. he is all but helpless at times, watching the two of them have a go at each other.

he knows. he is aware of their presence, and they are aware of his. but none of them are in the same physical state. he knows what they are, and knows he has a choice because he has the power to choose.

one of them says "live the good life!" the other screams "you only live once, let's have fun!"

can't there be a balance? or should we just end this all? he cries...

an excerpt by ms demon in exit

about guitar

2007-07-13T16:17:00.000+08:00

today i played the guitar ill my left wrist got sore and my fingers got cut. i don't freaking care. kinda frustrating when your guitar doesn't feel good to you anymore. gosh i gotta change them strings. and i need a new bridge for the guitar. sheesh. its an old acoustic guitar anyways.

and i need a les paul. now.

one day down

2007-07-12T23:55:00.000+08:00

i can't really fall asleep. i feel like a fat piece of mush. i need exercise. i guess going back to camp, and starting the next batch would somehow spur me on to tone up. furthermore, ahm is coming up in august. i'm gonna do a crash conditioning of my body to run the whole 21km.

apart from that, i've been having pretty weird dreams lately. the first strange one was a couple of days back, where i dreamt of going into the future and stumbled across a wedding. at first i thought it was mine, but come to think of it, the guy seemed to be the polar opposite of me. the second would be dreaming of a person. the third, if there was one, i can't really remember. but this afternoon while i was napping away, i dreamt of going somewhere far away for class. and well, i rode on my computer chair, yes the one with 5 wheels, and coast on the expressway. then, i found myself in a cave, fighting monsters, an ability which i was apparently very skilled at. after all that fighting, while heading home (riding on my chair), i stopped at a bus stop where a group of 'bengs' tried to tick me off. of course one of them had his arm almost broken by me, while the rest stole my wallet and handphone. i went after two of then, giving them a nice punch to the head, but the rest managed to run away. i then threatened to call the police.

the phone rang and i realised it was three in the afternoon. bummer.

but anyways, i felt that i've wasted most parts of today. i should've gone to cold storage. damn.

unexpected

2007-07-11T20:58:00.000+08:00

it's been quite awhile since i've had something to say about the world i live in. you may even call me crazy because i'm one crazy ass who bothers to type and vent his frustrations online. somehow i think i am, but hey, i'm just doing this for the fun of it.

anyways, i'm mentally preparing myself for 9 days of in camp stay-in due to the next intake coming this saturday. currently, i'm wasting my precious time away, lazing around at home while immersing myself in the homely ambiance of my room. and not to mention, lazy afternoon naps, crazy solo-shopping and making sweet music on my guitar (oh i just learnt how to play 75% of hotel california in about 4 hours today). kudos to a laid back lifestyle.

somehow, before logging on the the computer, i seem to have a swarm of ideas and thoughts buzzing around in my head. right now, i think all of them left my head. strange.

oh yea.. let's talk about my new camp. one of my friends, Salman, say that he had a ghostly encounter during his duty in the company. he "heard banging noises" coming from the store room, more precisely, the metal cupboard inside the store room. with my sheer skepticism, i jumped to an immediate conclusion that the noise was to have been caused by a mouse (or a rat), a monitor lizard (yes they do run around at times, pretty scary), a cat (which i haven't seen in the camp premises yet) or a dog (a puppy perhaps). or maybe it could be:

the contraction of the metal cupboard in the cool evening due to the drop in temperature, causing the metal shelves to warp and distort because of the uneven contraction of the metals. hence, items that may have been placed in precarious or awkward positions in the cupboard may have fell off, or been dislodged or nudged out of its original position.

=)

i'm in one of my genius moods again. then again, i have been wrong. who knows, right?

on a side note, the camp is rather cosy and peaceful, with no one to bother me, or bother us for that matter. and i must say, sleeping on a new mattress, with new blankets and new pillows, not forgetting new bedsheets and pillow cases, makes sleeping a great pleasure.

call me if you decide to drop by. i'll show ya ma crib.

angst at work

2007-06-23T01:27:00.000+08:00

i don't know why, but lately, it seems to me that i tend to get angry at the slightest of things. i get agitated more often, annoyed more easily, and filled with angst most of the time. i can't be having my period. i don't bloody got no period.. okay well that's besides the point. anyways, i keep telling myself that some human beings are seriously retarded in some ways, especially the singapore-type ones. then again, i am a singapore-type one.

anyways here are what we self-absorbed bird brains tend to do without realising it ourselves:

not moving to the rear of the bus even though there's ample space to fit a fat arsed elephant humping a hippopotamus
walking in groups in an extended-line formation and blocking the escalator, or creating a human road block in shopping malls
resting one's knees onto the back of the backrest of the seat in front (applicable to buses) to the extent of the backrest actually breaking away from its metal frame

i'm pretty sure the list is non-exhaustive, but i am exhausted and hence this list becomes exhaustive.

then again, i'd love to share my views on those ABSD (applied behavioural science department) personnel in charge of conducting surveys for us serving the nation. i guess there must be a criteria to be met in order to be entrusted with the duties of carrying out the survey. they are:

loud
able to nag
long-winded
irritable
irritating
annoying
irrational
one-tracked mind
bird brain(s)

once again, the above mentioned list is non-exhaustive, and you may add what you feel may be the most appropriate qualities that they should possess. i would go on dissing them, but i feel that there's no point in doing such a thing. we all know that what they do, and how they act makes them alike to our animal counterparts, and of course their one-tracked minds makes it impossible to introduce more efficient methods to them.

kudos, i say.

great annoyance

2007-06-17T21:42:00.000+08:00

i'm starting to think singapore is beginning to become more and more mundane and boring to me. well this probably isn't the first time i'm thinking of this, but hey, on this sunny island, there are not many things to do and places to see. then again, it's kinda cosy living here though.

okay enough of this rhetoric. i'm writing to complain about people around me. the other day i was tasked to carry out duties as a tour guide during one of the enlistments and i got quite fed up with some of the parents. not because they asked me too many questions, but they asked me bloody dumbass questions that simply pokes me in the buttocks.

one example of such questions would be: "how often can my son wash his clothes? are you guys going to tell him when to wash his clothes and how?" come on lady, if your son does not know how to wash his own clothes using his own pair of hands, he might as well cut off his own two arms and shit on them. children nowadays are pampered, no wait, they are f**king pampered. and well, i blame the parents! bloody hell!

i can't remember the other questions, but all i could remember was that it was annoying and irrelevant. if the questions were like for example, "is my son going to be as tough as you after 9 weeks?", then at least i'll be glad to answer them. but to be honest, i was only agitated at those questions that were somewhat stupid in nature. can't really describe them, but when you hear them, you'd take a jack knife and cut their throats.

anyways, i told the parents "don't worry about your son. just throw him in here and let him suffer. we'll take care of him and you don't have to be too overly worried or concerned. rest assured, he'll be a better person, more of a man at the end of his 9 weeks in here."

if we were to go to war, our 3G pussy soldiers will cower in their tiny 5-room apartments.

sunday

2007-06-03T13:24:00.000+08:00

there's just something about sundays that makes it... well... unique compared to other days. and as far as i can remember, i haven't been out on a sunday afternoon for weeks. i guess this can be attributed to the fact that sunday so happens to be book-in day for many of us, and i'd reserve my sundays with my family. but thinking about the 24 hours that goes into the whole of sunday can be quite interesting. let's begin analysing it from the start of sunday.

0000 hrs - 0800 hrs
i'll still be in bed, dreaming, and hoping that it would rain outside because a rainy sunday morning brings a blessed aura. and it's lovely too.

0800 hrs - 1000 hrs
time for breakfast. breakfast won't take 2 hours though. probably i'd take my time to shower and fry some ommelette.

1000 hrs - afternoon
well... 2 things i can do. one, i could stay at home, glued to my computer or my xbox 360, counting the time away until i'll force myself to get ready to book in to camp. two, i could hang out, catch a movie, take a long stroll and have a nice sunday afternoon tea outside.

night
ok i must admit, only the afternoon is fun. at night it is sleep time in my 2-men bunk. eurgh.

for me to have written all of these means that i'm bored to death. for the past 4 days i've probably been very unproductive, except for the 5km run. other than that... gosh i feel like mush.

forbidden happy things

2007-06-03T00:39:00.000+08:00

i had this dream of her. cute, honest. seeing her, though subconsciously, kindles the warmth in my heart. maybe because i missed her presence as the days felt like weeks. then again, it was a beautiful dream.

and i called her. i was rather surprised the number did work, despite being a super long string of numbers that i doubt anyone could memorise. but thank goodness, i had it saved in my phone. and you know since when? since my BMT days of course, and also the time when she was away the longest. i hated her for that, well not really hate, well you get the idea.

i thought to myself, maybe she is indeed a strong person deep down inside. she's definitely much stronger than her sister, and of course definitely more independent than her, and not to mention more resilient than her. us being together still is a testament to your strength.

probably you may be the most foolish person on earth, but every coin has its two sides. lay the coin to rest and let the right face show, for as long as we may live.

its been a long time, but, je t'aime.

the longest friday

2007-06-02T00:07:00.000+08:00

if you haven't heard the latest songs by Maroon 5, the only thing i could say to you is "what are you waiting for?" with tracks like 'if i never see your face again', 'makes me wonder', 'wake up call' and lots more, you are bound to be hooked on their funky new tunes. the band makes use of catchy lyrics, coupled with the right melody to portray a story with every song that is being played. my personal favourite is 'wake up call'. if you were to listen to the keyboards and guitars, you'd hear the dark and mysterious nature of the song, somewhat like a rainy Gotham City crime scene kind of setting. 'it won't be soon before long' is a definite must have for those Maroon 5 fans out there.

sometimes i lay to waste listening to songs. time seems to float past without a trace and i'm left gazing into the ceiling while being phased into another realm. today, some bad things happened to me, well not exactly bad things, but they were more of undesired than bad. okay first up was the heavy downpour that caught me by surprise before i went to the mosque for my prayers. then i thought to myself that i had to brave the rain no matter what, of course, with an umbrella in hand to aid me in my journey.

as i walked to the bus stop, pools of rainwater started to puddle everywhere, and basically i had no choice but to step through it. i was thinking to myself when i stepped into those puddles. i was no longer afraid of getting my feet wet anymore. probably due to the fact that i still have soldier-like qualities in me, or maybe that i just can't be bothered.

and so i got down the bus, and i was about a hundred metres from the mosque when a blue mini whizzed pass me at great speeds. the result, water splashed onto my denim jeans, soaking it from waist down and sending cold chills up my spine. yes up my spine. to my surprise, i wasn't the least mad. and yes it was a huge surprise, seriously, coming from a rage-o-holic like me. then again, must be the calm in me before my prayers.

oh well... now i am at home with nothing to do, and rotting my flesh away. if only there were great shows on the tele, then i won't be so grumpy as of now. grrr...

and with every second that floats by, i'm thinking of her.

when will she call me again?

when will i see her again?

story of a lonely guy

2007-05-31T22:07:00.000+08:00

he waits for her for weeks, hoping she'd return quick. he checks his mails, and checks his phone, hoping she'd contact him in one way or another. unfortunately for him, she never did. what could she be doing there? painful as it seems, he endured the searing pain in his heart and swallows the lingering agony. "just be strong", he tells himself.

dull days

2007-05-27T19:09:00.000+08:00

these few days have been such a drag. thankfully, all high key activities are over and i'm just sailing towards my next batch. however, it is such a pain not being able to have you here physically. gosh i miss those days, and now, i feel so alone.

at times like this, it is good to have a willing friend to talk to and to hang out with. i just wish it would be as simple as that. thinking of someone won't bring that person physically nearer, neither does hoping for someone to be there. i'd love to be able to call you, but i have no clue what your number is...

gee i feel so dead, so tired and mentally drained. physically exhausted and stretched to the limit. i need a long vacation, with someone, to get the mind off the stresses of everyday life, and to experience life on a different surface of the world.

argh boredom is killing me! good thing i'm going home this wednesday. and my parents will be out of the country! gosh if only you were here...

A lapse in time, memory's shortfall

2007-05-06T20:29:00.000+08:00

i realised that it has been weeks since i've placed anything up to be read and shared. i guess it must be the constant stresses of work and other priorities that come into play. lots of things have happened since the last time, and i must say so many things can indeed happen in such a short time.

i'm not to sure whether i should be thankful, or dread the fact that i'm back on the island when i belong. one of my friends said that it is a good thing, and well maybe i'll just listen to him and take his word for it. life on the island is somewhat relaxing at time, but can be a bore, a chore and a pain in the bum-bums when paperwork starts to bog you down. but other than that, i'd take my island life.

recently things starts to get a tad topsy turvy with people coming in and out and things just start happening without any rhyme nor reason. i can't explain why either. and the more i think of it, the more my head wants to pop open and release the thousands of yellow chicks screaming "argh! argh!".

on a separate topic, my computer is giving my lots of problems. it loves to freeze, which in turn makes me punch the computer tower. i've knocked it several times already, and well it kinda seems pretty screwed up but hey its working right now so im not complaining. i'm just pretty vexed that i'm unable to get Heroes and i'm gonna punch the computer really soon.

yesterday, i managed to catch Spiderman 3 on the movies (finally) and well was quite excited. however, my movie experience was partially ruined because of ill-disciplined children who don't know how to keep their bloody mouths shut. as much as i love kids, these kids deserved to be hanged up on a wall, with a hook to their pants. then hire some imps to poke their buttocks with sizzling hot iron rods while laughing gleefully and their crying faces. oh don't forget to bind and gag them so that they'd make little movements and little sound. but mainly i blame their irresponsible parents who don't ask the kids to shut up. if i were to scream and shout, i'd shout at those stupid parents (mothers) who don't even bother to tell their kids to keep mouths sealed. for your information, they were just watching the shows happily ignoring their kids while other movie goers were shhh-ing away. hope they trip and fall on their way home, sprain their ankles and can't walk for 3 months... wait... make that 6...

anyways, i'm like a ticking time bomb, waiting for the triggering moment to just blow up. and i'm still waiting.

a note to oneself

2007-03-25T04:11:00.000+08:00

our lives are what we deem it to be, be it prosperous or impoverished, gleeful or sorrow-laden, or faithful or reckless. most of the time i think we tend to overlook this fact, because we are simply human beings. we are indeed at times lazy to make the decisive change in our lives to make it better, to kick in into full gear and coast along the highway that is our life.

many a times, we tend to blame failures on external factors. 'it was raining'. 'i didn't have enough time'. 'she was late, which resulted in me being late'. common excuses that are being used countless times because we simply refuse to look at ourselves for the mistake that we've committed. simply put it: we always think we are perfect and that if we do things according to what we planned for, a discrepancy in its execution is always due to the negligence of others.

there are also those who are deemed as the 'hopeless case', always at the negative end, have personal grudges with their own lives and are basically dissatisfied with how their lives are. it is not that they are unable to break the shackles of their misery, but rather they are unknowingly unwilling to do so. think of it as being in a locked cage, and that the lock can only be opened if you slaughter a chicken. people would be reluctant to slaughter the chicken, but well slaughtering a chicken isn't a very difficult thing to do. so it boils down to the case of whether you have the will to escape from your emotional troughs and soar back up to its peaks. it is always mind over matter.

something also struck me, a spiritually strong person is emotionally strong. but you must have the right faith.

imagine, the blind

2007-03-04T14:47:00.000+08:00

i guess this place has been left rather untouched for far too long now. i've been busy for the past few weeks, juggling work and more work and some issues. fortunately, it has come to a point where the dust has settle, and so am i. so here i am penning down my thoughts like nobody's business hoping to gain some attention from unsuspecting surfers.

i've been thinking of this for quite some time: can the blind imagine how things were to look like? especially if they were born blind. anyone knows anyone who's born blind? i'd just like to find out because this is one of those things that not many people would think of and would ponder about. and well somehow i believe that though it may seem to be a curse or handicap to them, they might have something special about them that they have yet to discover.

anyways i'm kinda glad that i'm clean. been more than 2 weeks without the smokes, though somehow i feel that it isn't that hard to quit if you actually have things to preoccupy yourself with. like for me, i preoccupy myself with work, people and of course chocolates. yup, i'm a choco junky and i think it has become my secondary addiction. oh well, eat dark chocolates yea? at least they have the flavinol antioxidant, which is good for the body.

and apart from that, i'm finally leaving the island, and heading to a new camp. at least it is on mainland, and i won't have much problems having night's out. oh well... it's gonna be exciting...

ready to strike

it never ends

2007-02-19T12:35:00.000+08:00

and it really is true that the chinese new year holiday was going to be dull for me. with nothing to do and all the shops closed for the time being, i'm being quartered within the four walls of my house. somehow i wish that i could go visiting, at least i would not waste my time at home sleeping and listening to music.

all of a sudden it dawned upon me that today is a monday. monday is actually a lovely day, if there's no work and no worries that is. especially at about noon or a little later than that, that's when it is most ideal to laze around in a cafe and chill out with some friends. and maybe you could talk about whats coming up in the week, discuss business models or holiday destinations. lots of things to do on a monday.

but i got nothing.

in my heart i truly wish that you'd see things from my point of view. understand why i sacrificed so much for. and know why i let my heart dangle on that cliff's edge just to open up your eyes. i guess i never told you that i don't want to see you on the other side when that time comes. i never told that God is one and only one. i never told you that i believe in He, and submit to Him, the one and only and no one else.

i've let you speak from your eyes too much. now it is time for you to close your eyes, and close your ears, and shut all your senses. have no thoughts. all you need to do is feel with your heart.

no two ways

2007-02-16T17:38:00.000+08:00

it is interesting how different people chose to lead different lives. but it is even more intriguing how people who are akin to one another chose different paths in life. i can only heave a long and hard sigh, with a concoction of emotions swirling around in my heart.

God help me.

clouds!

2007-02-11T11:52:00.000+08:00

yes! God brought clouds to cover the sunday skies! i love cloudy sundays!

clueless sunday

2007-02-11T10:34:00.000+08:00

i don't have a clue. i'm puzzled. only couples are entitled to know each other's job? i know, it makes no sense to me too.

anyways today's a sunday. i want to hang out, go catch a movie, chill and hang out, eat, puff and leave all the worries behind. i guess i'll be returning to that wretched island tomorrow, giving me the whole of today to enjoy.

oh bummer it's going to be valentine's day this wednesday. so what have you guys got planned? somehow i feel that valentine's day on a wednesday is just a smash to the head. why? well because the next day is a freaking thursday, a work day. best day for a valentine's day: friday. without a shadow of a doubt. go figure.

i better be out of the house soon. i'll thrash about.

maybe i shouldn't

2007-02-10T18:06:00.000+08:00

something came over me a few days back. i don't know why it happened but it just happened. i told myself to give her another chance. but why? i have no idea. probably it was the fact that i was feeling very lonely, or that i can't lay the past to rest. it can be painful at times i must admit, but sometimes the feeling simply dissipates and i feel an air of calmness. like when i hang out with my boys at the smoking corner, we can simply just let the world go away and leave it all behind. i think it is just the company of friends that helps to alleviate the hurt and distracts your mind from your day to day stresses.

thinking about the week that's passed, i realised that different parts of the week would conjure different moods. here's my day to day interpretation of the 5 days of the working week. or at least my working week:

monday
work has just begun, and i have a long way to go before i finally get to go home. i look at the forecast of training for the week, and plan my lessons accordingly. at night when i go to bed, i'd think of anything random, from my past to what i'd do in the future. and that includes the upcoming weekend which is in fact a number of days away.

tuesday
only one day had passed, so nothing special about the second day. i have to keep the enthusiasm going to last me till friday, and show my boys that i'm in the same situation as them. the nights are quiet and lonely, probably the most emotional of the 5 days as i begin to reminisce and immerse myself deep in my thoughts. i also think of the people around me, and wonder whether they know i exist, or just chose to ignore my existence.

wednesday
i'm halfway there, and trying to stretch for the weekend. but at times, i may feel like im stuck in the middle. 2 days passed and 2 days to go. stalemate. here i'd try to think about what i'd do on friday night, planning to enjoy my weekend while trying to make myself feel better about the slow and draggy week.

thursday
there's an aura that always accompany the thursday. the day would be as any other day, but the day would also beckon for the night, and then the night would beckon for the next day, which would be a friday unless the end of the world came springing up suddenly. i'd usually enjoy dinner at the SBL, or simply spend the night on the rooftop, staring at the sky and getting high. thursday nights are nice, because you'd think of going home, and you don't think of anything else.

friday
friday is d-day. it is the day where i would be able to go home. but, knowing that i'm in a training school, i'm always prepared to go home on a saturday morning, which is just a bummer. however the air on friday is just different. the morning would be slow and calm, then friday prayers at noon adds an air of serenity on top of the laid back day. and as the clock ticks towards the 5 o' clock mark, i would just be on alert, to get up and go. but if i were to stay back, the night would make me think even more. friday nights makes me think rationally, as i try to reason out the thoughts that i have had for the previous nights. then i told myself, maybe i shouldn't.

i'm kinda bummed by the fact that i'm not doing anything tonight apart from watching soccer at home. i was so enticed by the idea of going for a solo movie, meaning catching a movie alone. but i kinda fell asleep and woke up late. and i didn't know what show would be nice. maybe i'd go watch later... if i have the time.

suddenly i realise that doing things alone is just a darn sad thing to do. but hey i'm a living in a world where 6 billion people would live 6 billion different lives with 6 billion different needs... and 6 billion lonely people.

ooh ooh that honeymoon

2007-02-04T16:41:00.000+08:00

all of a sudden my brain twitched and i thought about where i'd chose to go for my holidays and honeymoon. well i'd definitely go for more than one honeymoon because hey there are so many different places in the world that God made beautiful.

1. Paris
the city of love, the eiffel tower, the cobblestone streets, the alfresco cafes, the serenity of the parisian night...

2. Yellowstone National Park
nature at its most beautiful, the snow coated pine trees in winter, the grandeur of the snow covered mountain peaks...

3. Cruise over the atlantic
magnificent sunset over the wide open ocean, the cool wind plays with your senses, romantic nights on the ship's deck...

and if i may think of other prime destinations i'd be sure to pen it down. maybe Switzerland, Hawaii, Serengeti, Dubai, Turkey... i know there's more to say, but the mind is just an empty blank now.

the void on sunday

2007-02-04T14:30:00.000+08:00

i think the span of a few hours between 1pm to about 4pm has a strange universal void going on. this may be due to the fact that i'm at home, rotting away and have nothing much to do except for staring at the computer screen and blogging away. but at least i'm somehow enjoying this. i kinda think of the times when sundays were kinda nice because i'd go out for movies or lunch, but oh well none of that anymore nowadays. i guess i'd wait for that time to come again and i'll be enjoying my sundays out in town.

ah now i know why this void-like feeling came in the first place: because i'm the book-in duty officer today! if i wasn't, then i'd be booking in tomorrow morning, and probably enjoy my 5 day work week, or even may take half day off on friday! but well at least i've got things to do on that secluded island, like conducting lessons and playing the guitar. but when i start thinking of unfinished work that has been conveniently shoved into my hands, i kinda want to scream out and thrash about like a fish out of the water... oh well maybe not. and when i thought i would slack for the night tonight and watch soccer on the tele, i realised that i have some outstanding issues to settle.

bummer.

well it is going to be a very short week, not in terms of the number of days but in terms of how quickly it is going to pass. and one thing i hate is not having things to do during the week so i'd better plan for some jammed-pack action for my boys! oh and there's a hand grenade live throw this mid-week. am i nervous? well... probably on the day i'd be feeling the jitters but i pray to God that nothing bad would happen to me, and to those around me. it's going to be fun though!

then thursday will come, and then the holy day, and then it is home sweet home! gotta start making plans for the upcoming weekend. anyone interested?

the beach run

2007-02-04T00:25:00.000+08:00

somehow i just wished the beach was a couple of minute's walk from my place... i think i had already wished for that before. well running along the beach at night is certainly much nicer than running around my neighbourhood. you get to see lots of people, smell lots of barbecued charcoal and the food that's being charred, the blaring bass drumbeats from the bars and pubs and not forgetting the gentle breeze that makes you run like the wind. now that i think of it, maybe i should have covered more than 6km today, but i guess i became kinda lazy and well the thirst for green tea dropped on cue. now i'm starting to feel the effect of mr sandman's sparkles.

as usual, i took a bus home and of course had to have my music player on at all times during the journey. taking the bus home isn't such a bad thing despite the fact that the travelling time may feel like ages for some. for me, i'd just look outside the window panels and essentially looked around for beautiful scenarios, people, animals, well basically everything. it'd be better if i had my guitar, at least i can entertain the people on the bus with some songs...

now i was thinking... what if the brain were to be able to be switched off, well at least those parts of the brain that stores memory or that thinks. i'd love that idea. i think my brain needs to keep quiet because the neurons are firing away like a raging thunderstorm. sooner or later i think i might be going crazy. and now my brain cant even tell my eyes to stay open for awhile more. apparently the coffee that i was drinking didn't really work much.

i think i better hit the hay...

no need to brood, need music

2007-02-03T18:00:00.000+08:00

somehow when i reach this dashboard page i forget what i was going to rant about. maybe give me a couple of moments...

okay done. i was thinking about this statement a couple of days back:

"i wished we/this/that (or whatever) never happened"

then i started thinking of the show "the butterfly effect" which somehow hushed the statement above. like a ripple that propagates across the surface of a water; it doesn't take anything particularly huge to be dropped to cause the ripples. then it made me think again: maybe we shouldn't wish that the past never happened (if it was bad that is), but we should be thankful that it happened because whatever goodness that lies ahead in the days to come is because of that past of yours. then again, that good thing in the future may just be your fate. and back to square one we go.

last week in camp was a rather terrible week, when tuesday came. i slept with my mp3 player running throughout the whole night, and woke up to a piece of dead gadget. i was extremely horrified because i desperately need music to operate and function as a sane human being. thus as a result, my nights became dull and sleepless. even after a can of green tea and something else i just can't seem to let the sandman cast his sleeping sparkles around. however despite sleeping at one in the morning for the past two days, i'm somewhat awake now, which means that i'll be going for a run at the beach tonight. that's something i've promised myself for a long time now.

okay. better go prep for tonight's run and leisure stroll at the beach.

beautiful gray sunday

2007-01-28T12:56:00.000+08:00

and today i woke up late. damn. in my heart i was cursing myself for my inability to be aware of the ringing alarm. as a result, i woke up too late to go to the beach early for a lovely morning run. it's kind of a bummer that it takes an hour or so to commute to the beach from my place, thus i truly envy those staying in marine parade or anywhere near the beach for that matter. in the end, i still ran the boring route around my housing estate. i love running, but somehow it makes running less enjoyable.

i still have yet to eat something proper, apart from drinking milo in the morning before my run. i'm going to indulge on some mouth-watering dishes later, and at the same time, enjoy the beautiful gray sunday. i'm rather puzzled at why people dread the dark gray skies on sundays. i say it is the most beautiful thing that one can ever experience on a sunday, especially in the morning. the cold air give you the opportunity to make yourself a warm cup of coffee or tea to start your day with, then as you watch your favourite sunday morning tv shows, you sink your teeth into those crispy kaya toast. and for those with large appetites, maybe a half-boiled egg to start with? lovely isn't it?

my stomach is starting to grumble. time for brunch.

tired and on saturday

2007-01-27T15:19:00.000+08:00

well it seems that i'm finally back from work. field camp has been nothing but fun, but also tiring for me and especially my section commanders for their help and effort in instructing the cougar boys. i must admit they are a fun bunch those cougar boys, but they do get out of hand if you don't control them well. at least for some of them...

but anyways i was so glad to finally reach my doorstep yesterday, though i was feeling extremely exhausted and sluggish, i managed to force out a smile when i saw my dad and and siblings. and like many other tired person, the first pit stop in the house was the soft and springy bed mattress. and of course my guitar, which i then jammed the tune of Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls.

it has been raining for a couple of hours now, and somehow it makes the saturday gloomier than ever. well that's what i see from my perspective at least. but then i think again. i love the rain because it makes the skies dark, and when the skies are gray i decide how to make it blue again for me and for those around me. so many things i can do, like going to the beach (even though it's wet but the sea looks magnificent when pummelled by those rain drops), catching a movie (even watching alone can be a good experience because you'll be able to concentrate on the show more), and not forgetting shopping or even window shopping. and to end the day off, chill out at a nice spot overlooking the peaceful cityscape, or the distant sea while sipping an ice cold frap. when no one is around to accompany you, this is what you do.

i've always thought i needed her, oh how wrong was i. i'm living a love-hate relationship... with life.

down, down, drown

2007-01-14T16:02:00.000+08:00

i'm going through the troughs of my life again, and well i must admit it isn't a very healthy thing to be caught in. i can hardly sleep at night, and i'd usually sleep with the lights on. things are just not going my way, and well i can't really expect it to go my way all the time. well firstly, my new room is infested with a host of insects that apparently knows how to hide themselves from me. i always get insect bites at night, and the worst thing that happened so far was waking up to a swollen elbow. and secondly, the roof would leak. rainwater would somehow trickle from the crevices and drip onto the right side of my bed. yes, half of my bed is now soaked, and i only sleep on the other half. the bed was not the only thing that was drenched, the floor too. something like dark water. gosh everything suck.

i was doing regular internet surfing and i found this:

"i just wished we never happened, and you never came along, and you never said yes, because now the hurt remains and will forever be a thorn in the heart. why was i so stupid to have even let it happen... i hate myself, i can't bring myself to say i hate you. i do still love you. maybe. i just don't know.."

truly i feel for this guy, i know his hurt, i know his sorrows. it's kinda amazing like how many people have problems with their relationships, and well it's not that hard to find out too especially if it is posted on the net. sigh, wish i could help him out.

oh well i guess i won't be putting anything up for some time now. i'll be out in the field next weekend (oh great) and would probably only be out on the following weekend. and well what's the weekend anyways, probably hang out awhile and then have to get home to do work. maybe if i have a long weekend i'd watch football outside, and maybe catch a late show. it's raining now, and usually i love the rain, but not today. maybe next time if it rains on a sunday, and if i have no work on monday, i'd give the beach a visit. maybe i could sing a couple of tunes and cry to the sound of the rain.